Tuesday, December 29, 2009

2009 it's almost gone!

This place is a ghost town again. Or it seems that way because all the quiet ones are here. All the gossipers aren't. It's been so wonderful. :)



Christmas was ok. Christmas day was not very easy to get through and I had myself a nice little mini melt down. But, I picked myself up (literally) and made myself get better because I didn't want Shael seeing me like that. Though when Mike got there with Shael, he said he could tell I'd been crying. Shael and he were both polite enough not to mention it.



The day after Christmas was the day that my family did our thing. It was weird to not go out to Grandma Dinwiddie's. To have only one Christmas to go to, besides watching Shael open her things. No Wilkinsons. No Uncle Dave & Kathy's. No stopping by Granny Go's if she wasn't already over at the Wilkinson's. And no Grandma Dinwiddie's. Life just moves right along.



I'm finally getting moving right along with getting my butt back in school. It's about time, right? My classes will be Rural Sociology, Infant & Toddler Development, Infant & Toddler Lab, Adolescent Development and one on line course called On Death & Dying. Not one of those classes am I dreading. I'm looking forward to each and every one of them with this giddy anticipation I can't even begin to describe. The story will change, I'm sure, in about a month. lol. I will have to come back this post and read it to remind myself of the hope I had going into the semester. The good news, my last class is over at 1:50 in the afternoon. The bad news, my first one starts at 8:00 in the morning. But, no evening classes,which I am ever so grateful.



I lost one coworker about 15 minutes ago. Didn't say a word about leaving, just walked out and left. Now I'm losing another. But she at least said something. Now it's only three of us in this building. Last week I was the only one here for the last hour of the work day on Monday and Tuesday. People just didn't want to stay. And I don't blame them. I didn't either, but I had to. Somebody had to.



About two months ago, I got a prophesy from someone during communion. My brain has a few swiss cheese moments, and this is one of them. I can't remember if it was Della or Pastor David who said these words to me. But I remember the words clearly. "Stacie, you will have a great influence on people in your circle. Your circle is going to broaden even into the past. Even people you went to high school with and haven't seen since high school will be influenced by you. They will see Jesus in you" These words keep ringing in my head like a bell when I talk to an ever broadening circle of friends from my past. Thanks to facebook. Weird. It's not even people I was particularly friends with in high school, but have become friends with now. I know I influence one, in particular. How many people out there get to hear the words "You saved my life last night? I had the gun in my mouth before you came over. I made up my mind that I would ask you to come over. If you came over, I would put the gun away. If you said you couldn't, I would pull the trigger" I thank GOD I went over there that night. That was one of the longest nights of my life. I knew it was bad so I slept in his bed with him. And I use the term slept very loosely. I was awake with every move or noise he made all night long. So, yes, that is influence. And I knew him when I was in high school.

There's others that I knew when I was in high school, but didn't go to high school with. I don't know if I'll have much, if any, influence on them, but who knows.



Shael turns 15-1/2 a week from today. Which means permit time! She's so excited she can hardly stand it. She had drivers ed for the fall semester so now she's gung ho for that permit. I'm a little mixed between happiness and trepidation. I know that for a while, anyway, I'm going to be chauffeured as often as weather permits. The weather better start cleaning up her act or Shael's going to be disappointed.

I got interrupted during that last paragraph by my Dad/boss sticking his head in the door saying "Let's go". He didn't have to tell me twice, so I saved this post and now I'm finishing it the next day. Last night when I got home, there was another friend request from someone I went to high school with. Hmm. Doesn't that just make you feel so popular? I'm sure everybody feels that way. :)

Only one hour and 40 minutes until the end of this short day. I hope the snow stays away until I get done with everything I wanted to do. I'm going to go to the hated Walgreen's and buy some perfume and fuzzy britches that I wanted for Christmas but didn't get. Walgreen's is the only place I can find this perfume, so I will bite the bullet and go. LOL

That's about it for now. My news of the month.

Thursday, December 17, 2009

I Know Who This Song is For!

I love the way you look at me
I feel the pain you place inside
Lock me up inside ya dirty cage
While I'm alone inside my mind

I like to teach you all the rules
I'd get to see them set in stone
I like it when you chain me to the bed
There ya secrets never shone

I need to feel you
You need to feel me
I can't control you
You're not the one for me, no

I can't control you
You can't control me
I need to feel you
So why's it involve

I love the way you rape my skin
I feel the hate you place inside
I need to get your voice out of my head
Cause I'm the guy you'll never find

I'm fakingf all the rules
There's no expressions on your face
I'm hoping some day you will let me go
Release me from my dirty cage

I need to feel you
You need to feel me
I can't control you
Your'e not the one for me, no

I can't control you
You can't control me
I need to feel you
So why's it involve....you and me..

I love the way you look at me
I love the way you smack my ass
I love the dirty things you do
When I have control of you

Friday, December 11, 2009

It's The Most Wonderful Time Of The Year

I just haven't had much news to post about, I guess. Last week, a week from today, I made contact with two high school friends that I haven't seen in 20 years. Both through Facebook. The first one works at a bar in Neosho and I went to listen to him sing. Amazing! I couldn't believe my ears. I had no idea the man could sing like that. I sat up there next to him on his little stage while he belted out songs and I sat there dumbfounded by that voice. I stayed there and visited and listened for an hour and a half then headed on home with the promise to definitely return and next time bring some friends. (I mentioned it on fb and last night some of my fb friends went out to hear him and they were pleased as well.)
After I left Neosho, I went on home and had cookies to bake for someone. I started drinking and baking at the same time. It's a wonder the cookies turned out decent because I didn't measure anything. I don't usually measure stuff when I cook, but when I bake, I tend to measure because it makes a little more difference. But, hey, the cookies turned out good. I was just throwing stuff in the bowl doing my best Julia Child impersonation (she and I were both born on August 15th btw) and sipping away on my rum & Coke. Yum.
While in the middle of all that, I was texting my other fb friend and I invited him over. And he came over! By the time he got there from Miami, I was already tipsy and he brought more alcohol! We ended up both getting very drunk (me especially) and stayed up all night long. I couldn't believe I did that. I got about 20 minutes sleep then got up and went to work. I did ok, but felt miserable. When I got home, took care of a few loose ends, then headed out to Branson. It's been a week, but I don't think that I've caught up with my sleep yet.
Branson was ok. Silver Dollar City was not much fun. It was so stinking crowded! People EVERYWHERE! It was virtually impossible to enjoy yourself. Ever see that picture of that crowded swimming pool in Japan? That's how SDC felt Saturday. At least we had a good time at Branson Landing before we headed out to SDC.




I have this entire office to myself this afternoon. It feels rather strange. At least I got all my stuff done this morning that required me walking over to accounting because I wouldn't be able to do that now. Get this: a woman called me earlier and wanted to know what the Tribe was giving out to the children at the Christmas party tomorrow because if it wasn't anything good, she wasn't bothering to come. I refuse to ever be that greedy or let my child be greedy. GREED! What an ugly UGLY thing it is. And what ugly UGLY people it creates. Jesus, help her.

I've been really working hard on getting myself enrolled for the spring semester. I'm going back no matter what. I sent my advisor an email and guess what!? She retired and I hadn't been reassigned to a new advisor. Yay. But, she was really nice and returned my email and said she had forwarded my email to someone who could help me. January 11 is the first day of classes so my first day would be January 12. The business committee hasn't gotten together over my case yet so I don't know my future here for much longer. I feel very up in the air and sometimes I get a little apprehensive, but I remember my goal, and forget about the rest. In a month from today, I will know more.

I'm jammin out to the sounds of Glen Miller, Billie Holiday, Ella Fitzgerald, Bing (affectionately known to me as "my" Bing), ole Blue Eyes and all kinds of smooth voiced singers. Or swing music, as in the case of Glen Miller. Makes this place feel happier to me. You know me, I've been known to break out in song no matter where I am. Work, home, store, doesn't matter. Instead of "GOTTA DANCE!!!" it's "GOTTA SING!" I totally skipped my classical mood this fall and have gone through a jazz mood. I love that jazz. Not smooth jazz. I hate that crap. But real jazz.

Hey, the decorations for the office Christmas tree just arrived. Finally. I put the tree up yesterday. A little late, I know, but better late than never. I hated that the place didn't have any kind of decoration acknowledging Christmas, so I requested it. I volunteered to put everything up and take everything down, so I got what I wanted. They had all the stuff, just put away in storage. People aren't very Christmasy around here. I am, that makes up for it. Since when do I care what they think anyway? lol

MERRY CHRISTMAS!