Spring Break
Yay, for Spring Break! Even if the only thing I do is work. The most exciting thing I've done is gone and gotten my hair done. But, my hair is frickin awesome, so that is pretty exciting to me. I was so sick of my brown hair. It was dull and looked horrible. But not now. Roni cut it and colored it and I LOVE IT!
School is going ok. I finished one class, the Saturday class. I was very glad to get that one out of the way because it was kind of time consuming. Each week there were assignments due. My other classes are either lecture or we do the work in class. I've got two tests coming up on the same day. I think I'll do okay with them. The first time I had tests in there, I had no books and I did fine. An 82 on one and an 86 on the other. Imagine what I'll do with books!
Mike and I have been divorced for a year now. Unbelievable.
I am starting to become in desperate need of a car. Mine has been a good one, and I am by no means complaining about it. But, it is starting to get a little worn. But, I'm in no financial place to buy one. If I can get payments low enough, maybe. MAYBE. I don't know. But, I gotta do something. Mine won't stay in alignment and I keep having to get it aligned and buy new tires. It's making this high sound when it goes fast, there's lots of wind noise on the drivers side from where the door didn't get put on straight when I hit a deer several years ago. It needs new floor mats. It needs cleaned up most of all. I think that might be an all day affair. Maybe I can get Shael to help me. Ha!
Shael is driving now, driving me all over the place, not up the wall too often, which is a good thing. She does well with her driving. Sometimes I have a few scared moments and I have to say "SHAEL!" just to get her attention. But, only when she's headed for a semi or a bridge, or something like that. She's gotten lots of her hours in already. She has to have 50 hours of drive time, 10 of which have to be in the dark before she's qualified to get her licence. She's driven me to Branson and back. She's driven me to school three different times. She likes that.
Shael also went out on her first date last weekend. I was a bit nervous and her dad was a LOT nervous. He almost didn't let her go and I told him "You're going to have to let her go sometime. She's old enough to go" It was suppose to be a double date and at the last minute the other couple couldn't go. Mike came to my house where she was getting picked up, so he could meet the boy. Right before the boy got there, I said "Oh, yeah, the other couple can't go, so it's just going to be Shael and her boyfriend". I wish you could've seen the look on his face. He started grinding his teeth and his eyes got dark and he was brooding. "I don't like that at all. Not one bit." is what he said. I was like crap! is he going to let her go now? But, he got over it and let her go. The boy got there, was all nervous and shook both our hands with his soft pudgy ones that felt so baby like. I think Shael's hands are rougher than his. But, anyway, introductions were made and an awkward silence followed. Finally Mike broke the silence and said very politely, "Be careful with her, ok? This is her first time out". He said "yes sir" and they were on their way.
Mike and I stood there watching them drive away. I felt so sad. Not because Shael was leaving on her first date, but because Mike was at my house and getting ready to leave to his own house, formerly our house. He was soon to be leaving to go to his girlfriend and I was soon to be alone in my apartment. I kept trying everything I could to keep him there for as long as I could without it seeming like I was trying to keep him there. But, he, of course, went on his way and left me standing there watching him drive away. Something I never do because it hurts way too much. In fact, I only stood there and watched that for a few seconds then started inside. But, I looked back. Good thing I didn't turn into a pillar of salt. Seeing his back as he drove off on his bike was like a major slap in the face. I ran inside, grabbed my purse and my keys and got in my car. I couldn't stay there. I went to the grocery store in Seneca and once I got there, I had no idea why I was there. I just kind of stood in the aisle trying not to cry. I made it out of there, got in my car and the tears started. They didn't stop for about 3 hours. I can't stand that. Sunday really was no better. Because of the snow, we didn't go to church so we just sat at home watching movies all weekend. I did lots of crying on Sunday and Shael was kind enough to act like she didn't' notice. When I took her home Sunday night, it was the worst. I cried just knowing that I was going to be seeing my house that's not my house anymore. See where I use to park all over grown now because no one parks there. Which is a good thing. I would be pissed if she parked there. But, what I did see broke my heart. A clean patch on the ground with no snow on it. Showing that her van had been there overnight. A shot to the heart.
But, I have to say, after last night's service at church, I have relentless faith. I am relentless and specific in what I want and I'm not going to give up until I have it.
School is going ok. I finished one class, the Saturday class. I was very glad to get that one out of the way because it was kind of time consuming. Each week there were assignments due. My other classes are either lecture or we do the work in class. I've got two tests coming up on the same day. I think I'll do okay with them. The first time I had tests in there, I had no books and I did fine. An 82 on one and an 86 on the other. Imagine what I'll do with books!
Mike and I have been divorced for a year now. Unbelievable.
I am starting to become in desperate need of a car. Mine has been a good one, and I am by no means complaining about it. But, it is starting to get a little worn. But, I'm in no financial place to buy one. If I can get payments low enough, maybe. MAYBE. I don't know. But, I gotta do something. Mine won't stay in alignment and I keep having to get it aligned and buy new tires. It's making this high sound when it goes fast, there's lots of wind noise on the drivers side from where the door didn't get put on straight when I hit a deer several years ago. It needs new floor mats. It needs cleaned up most of all. I think that might be an all day affair. Maybe I can get Shael to help me. Ha!
Shael is driving now, driving me all over the place, not up the wall too often, which is a good thing. She does well with her driving. Sometimes I have a few scared moments and I have to say "SHAEL!" just to get her attention. But, only when she's headed for a semi or a bridge, or something like that. She's gotten lots of her hours in already. She has to have 50 hours of drive time, 10 of which have to be in the dark before she's qualified to get her licence. She's driven me to Branson and back. She's driven me to school three different times. She likes that.
Shael also went out on her first date last weekend. I was a bit nervous and her dad was a LOT nervous. He almost didn't let her go and I told him "You're going to have to let her go sometime. She's old enough to go" It was suppose to be a double date and at the last minute the other couple couldn't go. Mike came to my house where she was getting picked up, so he could meet the boy. Right before the boy got there, I said "Oh, yeah, the other couple can't go, so it's just going to be Shael and her boyfriend". I wish you could've seen the look on his face. He started grinding his teeth and his eyes got dark and he was brooding. "I don't like that at all. Not one bit." is what he said. I was like crap! is he going to let her go now? But, he got over it and let her go. The boy got there, was all nervous and shook both our hands with his soft pudgy ones that felt so baby like. I think Shael's hands are rougher than his. But, anyway, introductions were made and an awkward silence followed. Finally Mike broke the silence and said very politely, "Be careful with her, ok? This is her first time out". He said "yes sir" and they were on their way.
Mike and I stood there watching them drive away. I felt so sad. Not because Shael was leaving on her first date, but because Mike was at my house and getting ready to leave to his own house, formerly our house. He was soon to be leaving to go to his girlfriend and I was soon to be alone in my apartment. I kept trying everything I could to keep him there for as long as I could without it seeming like I was trying to keep him there. But, he, of course, went on his way and left me standing there watching him drive away. Something I never do because it hurts way too much. In fact, I only stood there and watched that for a few seconds then started inside. But, I looked back. Good thing I didn't turn into a pillar of salt. Seeing his back as he drove off on his bike was like a major slap in the face. I ran inside, grabbed my purse and my keys and got in my car. I couldn't stay there. I went to the grocery store in Seneca and once I got there, I had no idea why I was there. I just kind of stood in the aisle trying not to cry. I made it out of there, got in my car and the tears started. They didn't stop for about 3 hours. I can't stand that. Sunday really was no better. Because of the snow, we didn't go to church so we just sat at home watching movies all weekend. I did lots of crying on Sunday and Shael was kind enough to act like she didn't' notice. When I took her home Sunday night, it was the worst. I cried just knowing that I was going to be seeing my house that's not my house anymore. See where I use to park all over grown now because no one parks there. Which is a good thing. I would be pissed if she parked there. But, what I did see broke my heart. A clean patch on the ground with no snow on it. Showing that her van had been there overnight. A shot to the heart.
But, I have to say, after last night's service at church, I have relentless faith. I am relentless and specific in what I want and I'm not going to give up until I have it.
posted by Stacie at
11:53 AM
|
0 Comments
