Can I Steal That Phrase?

Romeo, Romeo. Where is your sorry ass, dude? And when you decide to show up, will you clean my floors and wash my laundry? Shael's toilet could use a good scrubbing, also. Make sure you bring something that takes care of hard water stains and a good pair of gloves because I'd sure hate for you to get your beautiful hands all dried up with cleaning agents. Don't forget to also bring your leaf blower and lots and lots of lawn trash bags. And if you have a weed eater that works without having to hold your mouth just right, that would be greatly appreciated. But, if you have to hold your mouth just right, that's alright too because you will be the one using it anyway. Feel free to bring some Montagues with you, or even a few Capulets, for that matter. You're going to need some help with that spare bedroom and the music room.

While you all do that, I'm going to get to work on my Christmas cards, maybe watch a little Hallmark TV, sip on some sweet tea while I read my seven new books I just got in Dallas. Happy cleaning!