It's Been A While

I don't know what I was thinking when I said I'd go to the city wide garage sale Saturday. After the first hour I was ready to go. But, oh, no, we didn't go. Not until after the 5th hour. In five hours, I bought:

a sweater for Shael because she'd not come prepared and was cold.....$0.50

four hats at 2 bucks a pop............$8.00

two bottles of water............$1.50

a large bag of kettle corn............$5.00

a pair of pink plastic flip flops.............$0.10

Grand total.......................$15.10

I didn't buy one single book. Can you believe that? I hardly even saw any books anyway. I did see the final book in the Left Behind series for sale and the lady and I discussed it for a minute or so. Actually, the woman was discussing it with two of her friends and I spoke up and gave them my opinion and they looked at me like "Who asked you?" at first but quickly warmed up to me (they were church ladies, after all. No, not the Dana Carvey type of church lady. Isn't that special?). It seemed that each garage sale, and there were at least 250, I only saw junk. Maybe the good stuff was picked over already, we didn't get there until 7:00 in the a.m. Lots of knick knacks (and I certainly don't need or want another knick knack) and clothes. Since clothes was mainly what my sister in law was looking for, clothes for Nikolas and clothes for Sage, she was content to dig through endless piles of clothes. Oh, hey, she bought a toy at Jim Jackson's house. Who's Jim Jackson? Well, he's only the most famous news anchor in Joplin! I told Sonya I should have taken her picture with him, I had my camera in my purse. If it had been Gary Bandy, I would have taken a picture for shore! Gary Bandy has the most extensive musical knowledge of any person I know of. He's like a music encyclopedia. And now he's a weather man. Not just a weather man, but a meteorologist.

If you are driving through Neosho, you don't think too much about the hills. If you are walking through Neosho, you can do nothing but think about the hills. If you are waking up the next morning and your legs feel like your calves are being stabbed repeatedly with ice picks, you are cursing those hills. My dear little sister in law says she felt no ill affect on her legs. B**CH! No! I'm kidding! But it's not fair! Her legs don't hurt her one iota and mine are hurting something awful. Sunday morning Shael told me that she cried herself to sleep the night before because her legs hurt so bad. Even today, mine still hurt. I don't even want Mike to know how bad they hurt because I know he'd make fun of me. Just gotta make sure he doesn't watch me getting out of bed. Watch those first few steps, they're a killer!

We met my brother in Neosho and Sonya put all her treasures in his Blazer and they left to go pick up my Grandma and take her home from the beauty shop. Shael and I went to Joplin to find her an Easter dress. Do women not wear dresses anymore? We found lots of skirts, but none looked flattering on Shael. She finally decided on a pair of slacks and a blouse to match. The trousers were from the Juniors and the blouse was from the Womens. The best part being that they were both on clearance and I spent $22.08 on her whole outfit after taxes. The pants have to be hemmed, but what's new? I'll probably end up spending the same amount on shoes that I did on the whole outfit. It's a very cute outfit, it makes her butt look good. My eleven year old with a grown up looking booty? It's true. Unfair, but true.

Mike had gone on a 300 mile bike run Saturday and when he got home that night and told me how many miles he rode, my flat Indian butt hurt like heck just thinking about it. 1/3 into that ride I would have been begging for mercy. "Please, Mike. Call a cab, I want to go home on four wheels"

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Friday night we went into Grove and ate at Pizza Hut. On the way home, Mike sneezed this huge gut wrenching sneeze. I was driving, thank goodness. When he sneezed he thought it felt like it dislodged some, ahem, snot. So when he felt another sneeze coming and he couldn't find any napkins or Kleenex in the car, he stuck his face down his shirt for the second one. Oh, gross! He said it was all over his chest. "Didn't get on my shirt, though, that's pretty lucky" He dropped his shirt down so it wouldn't touch the chunks of snot spewed all over his chest. He continued looking for a napkin or something to wipe it on and I knew I only had a wadded up used Kleenex in my purse. So, I did what any loving wife would do. I reached over and rubbed his shirt up against his chest and got it nice and wet. "Oh, don't worry baby! Just rub it in" I honestly think it made him mad. He didn't talk much to me the rest of the way home. We were almost home anyway and I was halfway expecting him to take the shirt off when we got home and rub it on me. He might not have thought it was funny, but I sure did. Who says I don't have a sense of humor? Mike does, that's who. I thought it was dang funny and I laughed a good two minutes over that one. I don't know why he doesn't think I have a sense of humor.