Wednesday, November 29, 2006

Life

It comes at me so fast I feel like I'm spinning by the force of it. Why? I'm not working, I'm not really doing anything, but I feel like everything around me is going on without me. Take Thanksgiving, for instance. I took part in celebrating, but I somehow felt like I wasn't really there. Like I was watching myself take part in celebrating, but me, myself, I was in some far off place, hovering in the fog, waiting for someone to notice that I was absent from the festivities. It's funny how you can do things like you do year after year until it takes zero thought about it and you can have your mind a million miles away while your body does what people around you expect from you.
Sorry I'm so glum, chum. (I got that from a line in a book I read when I was a kid. Why so glum, chum?) Now you know why I haven't been posting much. Things, blog-worthy things, have been going on, but each time I try to post, it doesn't come out the way I intended. Instead, I have these inane thoughts pop into my head to post when I sit down at the computer. The dreaded what-if game is a popular game in my mind lately. What if Mike and I hadn't gotten back together, what would Thanksgiving had been like this year for both of us, not to mention Shael? Would he have gone on with the Wilkinson Thanksgiving dinner that I put together or not? Probably not. How often would he change the sheets on the bed? Would he even know where I keep the clean sheets or would he just take the set that's on the bed and wash them over and over?
I have these three soundtracks I got a while back to sing at church. One of them is ready. I've practiced a million times, I've got it down, words memorized and everything. I sound ready. I'm not ready. Because each time I even think about going up there on that stage with a microphone in my hand and singing a song and looking at that empty chair there on the front row, I realize I am not ready. Maybe next month. Until then, I'll keep practicing.

Sunday, November 26, 2006

As Promised,


Or, should I say, as threatened....Hee hee.

Monday, November 20, 2006

What's Wrong With That?

This may be a first and a last for me. I'm not a country music fan, as some of you may already know. I don't listen to it and I don't follow it's artists. I do know that there's a guy in Rascal Flats that's from Picher and Keith Anderson is from Miami. That's about the extent of my country music knowledge. (Except maybe that Garth Brooks is from the same town my youth pastor is from)
Well, where I was going with this story is the video that was filmed in Miami over the weekend. You have to be house bound with no outside contact to not know about this. We were driving down Main Street heading to the bank when we ran into a road block. A huge stage was being set up in front of the Coleman Theater. "What the...?" was Mike's reaction. Oh, yeah, this must be for that big Keith Anderson concert, I didn't know when it was, I just heard my cousin's wife, Shandy, talking about it the other night in Dallas. She was going to go early so maybe she could be on the front row. He was doing this free concert on Main Street Miami to shoot his new video for the song Podunk. I saw all kinds of signs saying "Welcome Home, Keith" and "Welcome Home to Podunk" and stuff like that. Even Arvest Bank got into it and put it out on their sign. Hey, maybe he'll put it in the video and that would mean a little bit of free advertisement for them, right? :)
Here's where it gets weird. Some people were offended. What? Because he was calling Miami "Podunk". Well, HELLO!! It is! One guy said he didn't want to use his car in the video during the car show scene because he felt it was very "condescending" to use the word "podunk". Come ON, give me a break! Now that, to me, sounds a little bit like the stupid ass Geico cavemen, and you know how I hate those cave men. The words to the song, Podunk, are not condescending at all. They are just true to life words that if you know the town of Miami, you know exactly what and where he's talking about.

*Attention*
All you offended people: Get down off your high horse and listen to the words.

Same Saturday night, same ol' crowd
Draggin' Main to the Safeway then turn back around
'Til curfew and then head down to the river's edge and get drunk
Ain't nothing new what else you gonna do out in Podunk
Well I knew this six-string was my ticket out
No flashin' red light was gonna slow me down
18 years old everything that I owned in the back of that truck
I put a dip in my mouth and I headed straight out outta Podunk
1st Chorus:
Goodbye, daddy looked me in the eye said go where you gotta go
But don't forget to call home
And momma cried keep Jesus in your life and I hugged her one last time
And then I headed down the roadin a dusty cloud of smoke
Out of Podunk
Bridge:
A lot of years gone by showin' on my face
Nothing in this life that time hasn't changed
I chased a lot of dreams and some of them came true
Ain't it funny how the very place I ran from is the place I'm runnin' to
Another Saturday night singin' to the same ol' crowd
Still playin this six-string but things are different now
I met one of those girls turn your whole world around girls
And wouldn't you know it
We got our eyes on a house 'bout a hundred miles south
Out in Podunk
2nd Chorus:
Goodbye, her daddy looked me in the eye
And said go where you gotta go son but don't forget to call home
And her momma cried said keep Jesus in your life and we hugged her one last time
Then we headed down the road to start a family of our own
Out in Podunk

Saturday, November 18, 2006

We Didn't Start The Fire

"We Didn't Start The Fire" by Billy Joel
CHORUS
We didn't start the fire
It was always burning
Since the world's been turning
We didn't start the fire
No we didn't light it
But we tried to fight it
CHORUS
hula hoops, Castro, Edsel is a no go
CHORUS
JFK, blown away, what else do I have to say
CHORUS
Rock and Roller Cola Wars, I can't take it anymore
CHORUS
We didn't start the fire
But when we are gone
Will it still burn on, and on, and on, and on...

Wham!

I feel so unsure
As I take your hand and lead you to the dance floor
As the music dies, something in your eyes
Calls to mind the silver screen and all its sad good-byes
I'm never gonna dance again
Guilty feet have got no rhythm
Though it's easy to pretend
I know you're not a fool
Should've known better than to cheat a friend
And waste the chance that I've been given
So I'm never gonna dance again
The way I danced with you
Time can never mend
The careless whispers of a good friend
To the heart and mind ignorance is kind
There's no comfort in the truth, pain is all you'll find
I'm never gonna dance again
guilty feet have got no rhythm
Though it's easy to pretend
I know you're not a fool
Should've known better than to cheat a friend
And waste this chance that I've been given
So I'm never gonna dance again
The way I danced with you
Never without your love
Tonight the music seems so loud
I wish that we could lose this crowd
Maybe it's better this way
We'd hurt each other with the things we'd want to say
We could have been so good together
We could have lived this dance forever
But no one's gonna dance with me
Please stay
And I'm never gonna dance again
Guilty feet have got no rhythm
Though it's easy to pretend
I know you're not a fool
Should've known better than to cheat a friend
And waste the chance that I've been given
So I'm never gonna dance again
The way I danced with you
(Now that you're gone) Now that you're gone
(Now that you're gone) What I did's so wrong
That you had to leave me alone

Friday, November 17, 2006

Can I Steal That Phrase?

Romeo, Romeo. Where is your sorry ass, dude? And when you decide to show up, will you clean my floors and wash my laundry? Shael's toilet could use a good scrubbing, also. Make sure you bring something that takes care of hard water stains and a good pair of gloves because I'd sure hate for you to get your beautiful hands all dried up with cleaning agents. Don't forget to also bring your leaf blower and lots and lots of lawn trash bags. And if you have a weed eater that works without having to hold your mouth just right, that would be greatly appreciated. But, if you have to hold your mouth just right, that's alright too because you will be the one using it anyway. Feel free to bring some Montagues with you, or even a few Capulets, for that matter. You're going to need some help with that spare bedroom and the music room.
While you all do that, I'm going to get to work on my Christmas cards, maybe watch a little Hallmark TV, sip on some sweet tea while I read my seven new books I just got in Dallas. Happy cleaning!

Thursday, November 16, 2006

I Can Hear The Time Ticking

I can hardly believe that Thanksgiving is only one week from today. I have got SO much to do before then. Instead, here I am, watching the free preview of The Hallmark Channel (nothing wrong with tons of old episodes of The Waltons, Little House on the Prairie, Matlock, and M*A*S*H).
I got home from Dallas yesterday morning at 3:15. Yes, that's a.m. I slept until Mike woke me up around 10:30 bringing me donuts and coffee in bed. He'd come home early from work. It was so windy he was having a hard time getting anything done so he just quit for the day. Today is much better. Now my days feel all mixed up, I can't seem to remember what day it is.
My Dallas trip was so fun. We had new blood this year. My cousins wife went with us so there were five of us. Aunt Edie, Mom, Roni, Shandy, and me. We had such a good time we decided we were going to go back to Dallas next year. There so much to do and see that we got nowhere near close to doing and seeing it all. When I got home and got all my purchases out and looked at them, I got to thinking that I sure didn't buy a whole lot for as much money as I spent. I got myself a good leather coat to wear on the bike and that was my major purchase. It wasn't cheap, a good deal, but still kind of high dollar. I had slight buyer's remorse when Mike said that he only spent $90 on his good heavy leather coat. But, once I got home and he got a look at it, he said it was worth way more than $90 and that I did, in fact, get a great deal on it. That made me feel so much better.

Okay, since this is my blog, and I have from time to time climbed up on my own personal soap box, let me take this opportunity to do it again. I absolutely LOATH those Geico commercials with the cave man. I hate them with a purple passion that runs so deep I feel this urge to drop kick the television through the back door every time one comes on. I usually mute it when one comes on, but just now I wasn't near enough to the remote to take care of it on time. Mike has Geico insurance on his motorcycle and it honestly makes me want to tell him to cancel it purely out of spite for those stupid commercials. I can't stand them.
I'm better now. I can climb down from my soap box. I'll just tuck it away somewhere out of the way so I can get it out another time when something else bugs me enough to want to shout out about it.

Friday, November 10, 2006

Fun With Shael



Shael and I went to Silver Dollar City yesterday to see their Old Fashioned Christmas. Once again, we didn't get to do or see everything we wanted to do or see. We were there about five hours even. How does that happen? We could have stayed longer, but I really didn't want to get home too awful late because it was, after all, a school night. Shhhh, don't tell the school why she wasn't there yesterday.
We had such a good time. I felt like she needed a little bit of Mama time where we went somewhere away from home and the nagging about clean rooms and homework. I knew she was looking forward to going, but she was totally impressed when I let her skip school for a day. I wanted to give that much to her after leaving her home while I traipsed off to Maine by myself and Mike traipsed off to Colorado with "the guys". I'll be taking off for Dallas Sunday after Sunday school leaving her here alone with her Daddy, so I'm hoping they have some good father/daughter time while I'm gone. I'm only going to be gone a few days, surely they can stand each other that long. When I was in Maine, Shael was only home three of the seven nights I was gone. I guess you could say Mike had some "alone time" while I was gone.

But, anyway, here are a couple pictures I took yesterday at SDC. Remember, it was November 9th, the Christmas lights and decorations were everywhere and it was 87 degrees outside. I specifically took her yesterday because of that. Today it's suppose to be 47 degrees by afternoon. So, it kind of felt surreal to be surrounded by all the Christmas decorations wearing a t-shirt.

Young Girl

Thanks to Gary Pucket and the Union Gap, I have the perfect words for my old crush. I was talking to my friend about him a couple weeks ago and laughing about what a fool I use to make of myself over this guy who was way too old for me. Thank goodness this guy showed some scruples and rebuffed all my advances. Oh, how pathetic I must've seemed! LOL.


Young Girl by GARY PUCKET AND THE UNION GAP

Young girl, get out of my mind
My love for you is way out of line
Better run, girl, you're much too young, girl
With all the charms of a woman
You kept the secret of your youth
You led me to believe you're old enough to give me love
And how it hurts to know the truth
Young girl, get out of my mind
My love for you is way out of line
Better run, girl, you're much too young, girl
Beneath your perfume and makeup
You're just a baby in disguise
And though you know that it's wrong to be alone with me
That "come on" look is in your eyes
Young girl, get out of my mind
My love for you is way out of line
Better run, girl, you're much too young, girl
So hurry home to your momma
I'm sure she wonders where you are
Get out of here, before I have the time to change my mind
'Cause I'm afraid we'll go too far
Young girl, get out of my mind
My love for you is way out of line
Better run, girl, you're much too young, girl

Back In 1986

Anybody remember the Slippery When Wet album? Oh, of course you do. Last night on my way home, I heard a song from that album that I haven't heard in probably 5 years or more. It immediately brought me back in time and even though the station was starting to fade, I didn't change it and I sang as loud as I dared with my child asleep in the seat next to me. Never Say Goodbye. Oh, wow. It totally reminded me of my old high school flame, Jerry. Even though we did say goodbye, and I think both of us eventually said good riddance, I remember bawling my eyes out hearing this song after we broke up. So, Jerry, where ever the heck you are these day, this one's for you.

"Never Say Goodbye"
As I sit in this smokey room
The night about to end I pass my time with strangers
But this bottle's my only friend
Remember when we used to park
On Butler Street out in the dark
Remember when we lost the keys
And you lost more than that in my backseat
Remember how we used to talk
About busting out - we'd break their hearts
Together - forever
Never say goodbye, never say goodbye
You and me and my old friends
Hoping it would never end
Never say goodbye, never say goodbye
Holdin' on - we got to try
Holdin' on to never say goodbye
Remember days of skipping school
Racing cars and being cool
With a six pack and the radio
We didn't need no place to go
Remember at the prom that night
You and me we had a fight
But the band they played our favorite song
And I held you in my arms so strong
We danced so close
We danced so slow
And I swore I'd never let you go
Together - forever
Never say goodbye, never say goodbye
You and me and my old friends
Hoping it would never end
Never say goodbye, never say goodbye
Holdin' on - we got to try
Holdin' on to never say goodbye
I guess you'd say we used to talk
About busting out
We'd break their hearts
Together - forever

And P.S. We did have a fight on prom night. We had lots of fights in those three years, so go figure we'd have one on prom night. I remember his exact words..."What did you do to your eyebrows? I'M GOING TO THE PROM WITH TAWNEY GAINS!"

Tuesday, November 07, 2006

My Trip

I'm kind of doing this backwards, but I thought I'd fill you all in on my trip. I've already let you know about my adventure back home, now how about my adventure there?
It all started at 2:00 a.m. on Tuesday, October 17. I had gone to bed around 11:00 the night before, but couldn't seem to sleep, I told Mike I reminded myself of that commercial where the kids can't sleep because they are too excited about the upcoming trip to Disneyland then the Mom whispers to the Dad in bed "You asleep?" and the Dad says "Can't. Too excited". That was me. Like Oscar on Armageddon, I was 99% excited 1% scared. Or was is 99% scared and 1% excited? You don't know, that's what makes it so...Intense.
Anyway, 2:00 I climb out of bed, take a shower and get ready. I'm ready to go by like 2:25 and I didn't need to leave until 3:00. So, what do I do? I did the two things I'd told Shael I wanted her to do. I put a load of laundry in the dryer that I'd left in the washer at 11:00 and unloaded the dishwasher. Then loaded the dishwasher back up and ran it. I'm sure Shael didn't mind at all, if she even noticed. Knowing her, that load of laundry would have sat in the washer until Mike ran out of clean jeans and had to break down and wash some four days later. Finally, at around 10 till 3:00, I went and gave Mike last minute hugs and kisses and he gave me last minute money (just to be on the safe side) and I hefted my heavy suitcase out to the car in the rain.
I got to Fine Airport parking a tad before 5:00 and parked my car outside in the "cheap seats" (or so I thought, seems there are no cheap seats at Fine Airport parking, but that's a whole other gripe). I was dropped off at the terminal at exactly 5:00 a.m. I was fourth in line to check in. Not bad. I was told to go ahead and electronically check in with my credit card. It was somewhat spooky to swipe that card for a second and have my whole itinerary and name and address pop up in 3.5 seconds. Big Brother. He's everywhere. But, anyway, I got checked in, got my luggage checked in and was told where to go from there. I went up the steps to find this huge line for the three X-Ray machines. I took my shoes off, placed my bag and purse on the belt and watched as it disappeared into the X-Ray machine, hoping it wouldn't somehow screw up my cell phone and camera SD card. I walked on through, got my shoes back and my bag and purse and found my gate with no trouble. I knew I had 90 minutes before I could board, so I sat down with my library book. (How many people do you know travel with borrowed books from the library?) I sat there and read for an hour. There were hardly any other people around. Finally around the time we were suppose to be boarding, they came on the loud speaker announcing that the plane we were to take from Tulsa to Newark N.J. was delayed. Because of bad weather, it had overnighted in Houston instead of Tulsa and it was JUST THEN leaving Houston. We had to wait for that plane to get to Tulsa from Houston, deplane, get cleaned up then we could board. We should be leaving by 9:30. It was 6:30 in the morning.
So, I went over to a little food place and grabbed me a bottle of water and a huge muffin. I sat down with it and called Mike to let him know my progress then I called Mom around 7:00 to let her know and to talk to Shael. Sure enough, by 9:30 we were leaving Tulsa behind in a big showery mess. Rain. With luck, and speed, I might still catch my connecting flight out of Newark to Manchester, N.H. Luck and speed were neither one with me that day. I missed my flight by about 15 minutes. No worries, I thought. They had told me in Tulsa that if I missed my flight, then I would automatically be booked on the 3:30 flight. When we got to Newark, it seems the same bad weather system that had created such trouble the night before in Houston had followed us all the way to the East Coast. We had to circle the city for 20 to 30 minutes before we could land, in the process my connecting flight flew off without me. Yay. My 1:45 flight that I missed by 15 minutes was probably the last flight to leave on time the rest of the day. I went straight to the information desk at the gate to make sure I was on the 3:30 and they were kind enough to tell me that the 3:30 flight was flat out canceled and I had to rebook on the 8:30. But hurry, because all flights are delayed and/or canceled and I might have a hard time getting a seat. This guy that got off the plane behind me heard this, too and we both scurried to gate 123 from gate 110 as fast as we could. When we got there, we were confronted with this HUGE line. OMG. We both just dropped our bags and our arms were still beside our bodies like we both had the air knocked out of us and we couldn't move. I called my friend to let her know what the situation was and she was watching my flight the whole time on line and knew what was going on, pretty much before I did. She called Hertz for me to make sure they'd still be there at the airport for me when I got in. They would, seeing as they didn't close until 1:00 a.m. I called Mike to let him know I'd made it as far as New Jersey. I stood in line for 30 minutes when the guy behind me got a brain storm. He called the airline on his cell phone and booked a seat on the 8:30 flight then, this is the best part, he asked the lady on the phone if she could help the lady standing in line in front of him because she was going to the same destination as he. She said sure and he handed me his cell phone and I was able to book a seat on the 8:30 flight without having to stand in the line anymore. Wasn't that incredibly nice of him? We left the line behind us, wishing all those other people luck, and decided to go grab something to eat. It was getting on to close to 3:00 and all I'd eaten all day was that muffin and that bottle of water in the Tulsa airport and a bag of pretzels on the flight. The Newark airport is massive! Like a mall with a food court. We both grabbed something from McDonald's and sat together and visited for two hours there. He was so nice, on leave from the Navy, coming back from Tulsa after a visit with his family and meeting his wife in Manchester only to turn around the next day for a flight to Denver with a weeks worth of visiting with his wife's family. Seems he'd even played in the NEO basketball tourney when he was in high school a few years back. Small world. We went back to our gate and checked the status on our 8:30 flight. Delayed. To 9:00. Oh, well, what's 30 more minutes, right? After waiting 6-1/2 hours already? Then it was delayed to 9:30, then 9:45, then 10:00, then 10:15, then 10:30 and we were finally taking off the ground at 10:45. I'd been at this airport for over 8 hours. I had been up since 2:00 in the morning. With only a few restless hours of sleep before that.
I really tried to sleep, I honestly did. I had my eyes shut the entire flight. The entire 42 minutes. Yes, I'd waited at the airport for over 8 hours for a 42 minutes flight. That sucked. From there, things get kind of blurry about the time. I know I was getting in my rental car sometime after midnight, I had already told my friend not to look for me that night, that I was going to get me a motel somewhere and drive in the next day. She said that was the smart thing to do. I got in the rental car, thinking that they were closing in less than an hour and I was glad I finally made it. I drove, in this unfamiliar city, in an unfamiliar car, trying to decide how far to drive before I got a room. I felt totally awake. I know it was my adrenaline, but I also knew that I might suddenly get exhausted and have to find a place to sleep immediately and I didn't want to be out in the middle of nowhere when that happened.
I drove out of the city, drove on into the next city, Concord, and kept on going. I drove and drove until 1:00 when I realized that I really did need to find a place to sleep. I stopped at a rest stop and briefly considered sleeping in the car there, but quickly dashed that idea. I looked at my map for probably the tenth time and decided that Franklin looked big enough to hold a motel since it had a hospital. I got to the Franklin exit and took it, went through this deserted town, not one single thing was open at 1:00. I drove all the way to the hospital and found not one single motel of any kind. I turned around, I didn't want to waste any more time searching at 1:30 in the morning. The place I'd gotten off the interstate only had one ramp, an off ramp, to get back on to the Interstate, I had to go to a little town called Tilton, a town that was a mere mile down the Interstate from where I'd exited. There I found a Super 8. Naturally. If only I'd stayed on the Interstate one more mile I would have found what I was looking for instead of driving for 30 or more minutes looking for what wasn't there.
I got checked in, got to my room and was changed into my nightgown crawling into bed at exactly 2:00 a.m. With the time difference, that meant I'd been up for 23 hours. Check out was at 11:00 and I had planned to sleep till 10:00 then get up and head out by 11:00. Mike called me and woke me up at 8:30. I answered all groggy and he said "Hey, did I wake you up?" Well, Duh! After talking to him, I couldn't get back to sleep even though I stayed in bed, desperately trying to. I think I might have finally dozed back off around 9:30 then the alarm went off at 10:00. I was walking out the front door of the motel at 10:59. (btw, the weather in Denver was snow, snow and more snow. I felt so bad for the nice kid who had helped me the day before, I was hoping he wouldn't run into more trouble)
I took off and was amazed at the beauty of the state. I drove straight up north through practically the entire state of New Hampshire. Through the White Mountains. Though I don't claim to have seen the entire state, what I saw was very beautiful. Twenty miles or so from Vermont, I turned east, toward Maine. Once I got off the Interstate, what greeted me was the most quintessential, quaint, New England "villages" I've ever seen. So beautiful. I am ever grateful I took that way. I took my time, stopping whenever I wanted, hurrying for no one. When I crossed over into Maine, I drove through about 1/2 mile of white birch trees that almost took my breath away, they were gorgeous. I mean, you see these trees everywhere, but at this one particular stretch of the road, they were amazing to look at. I don't even remember if they had any leaves on them still, maybe a few yellow leaves, but the trunks were spectacular to behold. The forest came right up to the road and the trees were hanging overhead to form an arch way of these pristine white trees. Absolutely gorgeous. If there hadn't been a car behind me, I would have stopped and snapped a picture. I should have anyway. Because, I never made it back that way.
I was really starting to get tired by the time I got to my final destination. It was 5:30 in the evening, about 24 hours later than I thought I'd be there. My friends greeted me with hugs and kisses and brought me in and wouldn't let me help with supper as they cooked. After a few hours of catching up, we headed off to my friend's apartment as we'd been at her parents home. There, I finally crashed. I slept like a log.
The next day, Thursday, she took me to Portland to Old Port and we spent the afternoon poking around shops and walking on the old cobble stone streets. The smell of salt water and fish a constant in the air. I could never get sick of that smell. I love it. I picked up some really pretty maple leaves and pressed them into my checkbook. They turned out beautifully, and now I only wish I'd picked up more.
On Friday, we went to Bar Harbor and Acadia National Park. It was a foggy rainy day, but that didn't stop us. We took off anyway. And I'm so glad we did. I saw some breath taking views from the top of some really slick looking rocks. Water crashing up against the rocks so far far far below me. The sound of the buoy in the fog. My friend and I agreed that we could both just sit for hours listening to that sound and never get bored of it. Bar Harbor was neat, but totally not what I expected. Not too sure what I expected really, but it was somehow smaller than I had pictured it.
On Saturday, we drove to Portland again to catch the Amtrak to Boston. The train was sold out by the time we reached the ticket agent (he wasn't a friendly bloke) so we decided to take a bus. We had to wait a little but that was no big deal. Once on the bus, I started feeling somewhat car sick. I didn't mention it, but instead kept my eyes glued to the monitor that was showing The Indian in the Cupboard. As long as I didn't look out the window much, I was fine, but I couldn't help myself and kept looking out the window here and there until I felt that nasty queasy feeling coming back then I'd watch the movie until that feeling went away. It didn't take long to get to Boston, and we quickly found our way to the T and rode the subway to the beginning of the Freedom Trail. Mike knows how I am about historic landmarks, I always like to stop and read them, well, Boston is a history buff's wet dream. Full of history. I didn't stop and read every single little detail about every single stop on the Freedom Trail, I was satisfied to stop and look, take a picture and go on with it. I wasn't sure how long it would take us to walk the entire length and I didn't want to miss our train back because we bought tickets in Portland for our return from Boston. But, another reason was because it was cold! Sometimes it was like we were in a wind tunnel when we got between those tall buildings. But, I needn't have worried. We made good time. We saw some pretty cool things, like Samuel Adams (the man, not the beer) grave and Paul Revere's home, and the church where he hung the lanterns (one if by land, two if by sea). We saw the USS Constitution. That was very cool. We walked across the Charles River, twice. When we got done, we still have about 2-1/2 hours before our train left. The train station is in the Boston Garden and there was a Bruins game that night and the place was packed with yellow and black jerseys so we walked a few blocks to a coffee shop and waited in warmth for close to time for our train. I called Shael and talked with her for a while, and when she found out I was in Boston told me to look for the Tipton Hotel. HUH? "You know, Mama, like on The Suite Life Of Zach and Cody". While my friend was in the bathroom, the radio started playing "More Than A Feeling" and I had to laugh at the idea of listening to Boston in Boston. When she came back it was still playing and I mentioned it and she laughed at me laughing because she would have never even noticed. We made our train with plenty of time to spare and I was secretly glad that it was already dark when we got on it after that bus trip. I wasn't too sure if a train ride would do the same.
It was very late by the time we got back to her apartment and we ended up staying up even later when we got there. It was 3:00 in the morning before we went to bed.
Sunday was a very laid back and lazy day. It was cool out and we hardly even stepped outside all day. We drove into the nearest town with a grocery store and she bought some groceries and that was about it. She did laundry and her and I played cards all afternoon just about. That game of Nertz lasted hours! No wonder we use to play it till the wee hours of the morning. Her parents came over and we had a nice dinner and lots of lively conversation concerning a poem about a bear and my dad. (hee hee)
The next morning, my friend had to return to the real world and go back to work. After her and her daughter left, I got up and slowly got myself ready. It was raining pretty good that day and I was hoping the weather would hold off until the next day when my flight left. I drove off from her apartment at 10:00 and was finally leaving town and getting on the nearest Interstate by 11:00. It only took me three hours, even including the stopping for lunch somewhere around Kennebunk. I was checking in to my motel in Manchester, just a mile away from the airport, by 2:00 in the afternoon. At 5:00 I ventured out and ate a good supper of seafood chowder in this little diner across the street after filling up the tank of that rental car. I was back in my room in a little over an hour and watched a movie. Everything seemed so anticlimactic somehow. I finally turned out the lights and went to bed at 8:00. But, I kept waking up every 30 minutes all night long, afraid I would oversleep, that the wake up call at 4:00 wouldn't come. But, I shouldn't have worried, it called.
When I got back to the rental car return the GPS (Hertz NeverLost, that was totally cool) announced "You have arrived". I felt like I really had.
You all know the rest.

Friday, November 03, 2006

An Awesome Song by Skillet

Rebirthing by Skillet

I lie here paralytic
Inside this soul
Screaming for you till my throat is numb
I wanna break out
I need a way out
I don’t believe that it’s gotta be this way
The worst is the waiting
In this womb I’m suffocating
Feel your presence filling up my lungs with oxygen
I take you in
I’ve died
Rebirthing now I wanna live for love wanna live for you and me
Breathe for the first time now I come alive somehow
Rebirthing now I Wanna live my life wanna give you everything
Breathe for the first time now I come alive somehow
I lie here lifeless
In this cocoon
Shedding my skin cause I’m ready to
I wanna break out
I found a way out
I don’t believe that it’s gotta be this way
The worst is the waiting
In this womb I’m suffocating
Bridge:
Tell me when I’m gonna live again
Tell me when I’m gonna breathe you in
Tell me when I’m gonna feel inside
Tell me when I’m gonna feel alive
Tell me when I’m gonna live again
Tell me when this fear will end
Tell me when I’m gonna feel inside
Tell me when I’ll feel alive

E-mail to my Friend

I guess, basically, what I wanted to tell you was that everything went pretty much smooth all the way home. With the exception of one little glitch. When I packed my stuff back up, I thought it would be a good idea to put the stuff I needed in my carry on so I wouldn't have to lug in that big old suitcase into the motel with me. Bad decision. True, I didn't have to lug that heavy thing (straight up 50 lbs. by the way) up three flights of stairs with me at the motel, but it caused a small problem the next morning at the airport. Duh! I wasn't even thinking about that. I had to throw away my Mary Kay moisturizer (almost brand new), my toothpaste, my can of deodorant (brand new before I took it to Maine, so only used a week) a little motel size shampoo and a motel size hand lotion. The Mary Kay was the hard part. I think I even said shit in front of God and all the TSA people. But the worst part was having them stop me and go through my entire bag and my purse, while making everyone behind me wait until they were done. One of the stupid reasons why was when they asked me for my boarding pass I handed them what I thought was my boarding pass. Wrong! When I had reached into my purse for my boarding pass, I grabbed the whole little envelope thingie that they hand you at the check in counter, you know? Well, the boarding pass stayed lodged in between my camera and my coin purse and the envelope with the connecting flight boarding pass came out in my hand. So when I handed them a boarding pass, it said from Newark to Tulsa. The guy said "STOP! THIS IS NOT A BOARDING PASS!" I was like "WHAT? Let me see that" and I yanked it out of his hand. Well, I saw immediately what it was and told him that the other one must still be in my purse. So, he yells down the line for the other guy to get my purse after it's gone through the X-Ray to look in my purse for my boarding pass, and of course, it's right there. He brings it to us, hands it to me, then I hand it to the other guy, why the first guy didn't just hand it to the second guy in the first place, I have no idea. So, when I finally got to walk through, the thing squawks. Great. The guy asked me if I was wearing a belt and I said Yes, but the guy who made me throw away my toothpaste and deodorant told me I didn't have to take it off, I specifically asked him. He didn't care, he just told me to remove my belt and send it through the X-Ray. So, I did. Then walked through again and then it was okay. By the time I got to the end to my stuff, guy number two said "hold on", and started to go through my entire bag and my purse. He found my little bottle of motel lotion and motel shampoo that I had put in the appropriate zip lock baggie. He walks off to yet another guy, converses for a few seconds then comes back and when he looks at me standing there, holding my pants up with my hands because without a belt, those britches just fall right down to my ankles, he did seem nice and friendly enough, even smiled and looked like he felt some pity for me. He held that little baggie up and I said "Oh, for heaven's sake, just throw it away if it's going to cause more problems" and he smiled and said "Good, because that was your only option. You can put your belt on now." and he started putting everything back in my bag. Breaking the santa stick your Mom got for Shael in the process. Okay, first of all, what's up with the whole zip lock baggie thing? Second, that seems like a joke when it comes to national security. If you are going to let people go through with up to three ounces of lotion and/or lipstick, why the heck would you want them to put them in zip lock baggies? Like some body's going to get on the plane and try to make a bomb out of their lipstick and see it in the zip lock baggie and say to themselves "Oh, no, it's in a ziplock baggie, I can't blow this plane up now. Cursed ziplock baggies, I rue the day they were invented." That's ridiculous.
The people behind me during all of this fiasco were fairly patient. Not one word was uttered, or even muttered. I only heard one sigh, and heck, even I was doing that. After all that, I went up to my gate, sat for a few minutes, sent Roni a text asking her to bring me some more moisturizer, I was suddenly out, and sent Mike a text that I'd just lost my moisturizer, toothpaste, deo, lotion, and some shampoo, but all was well, I was finally on my way to the plane, in an hour and a half. The text woke Roni up and she was totally confused at 4:00 in the morning why I would text that I needed more moisturizer at such a weird hour. Mike got the text when he got up at 5:30 and he was somewhat concerned that maybe I got hastled and was all upset. Since I had an hour and a half wait, and the bookstore wasn't open yet, I went and got some yogurt and a bottle of water and watched TV in this bar that was open. I saw a guy order a beer. At 5:30 in the morning! When I finished my yogurt, I went back to the gate and sat there and people watched for the next 20 minutes or so until they boarded the plane. It left ten minutes earlier than I thought and since we were leaving at 6:40 instead of 6:50, that meant we boarded about 6:10. We actually left about five minutes ahead of schedule and things went smooth sailing from there on out, the rest of the day.
In Newark, I got off the plane, went to my next gate and found a Borders right across the hall. I went in, bought me a couple post cards and a Nicholas Sparks book and went and sat down at my gate. I got out my ticket to make sure and good thing I did because I had sat down at the wrong gate. I guess I had a dyslexic moment, because my gate was number 110 and I was sitting at 101. So, I got right back up, feeling kind of silly since I had just sat down, and went on to gate 110. Gate 110 had a bathroom right next to it, so I went in and used it, then came back out and sat down to wait. I had only read about five pages when they called us to board the plane. I forgot to mention that my foot was hurting like a bitch, so I was using those moving sidewalks like crazy and holding my foot up like some out of place flamingo. I hobbled up to my gate, walked to my seat in the plane, and was never so grateful for a plane seat in all my life. It hurt so bad! We took off from Newark right on time and I felt a sigh of relief because up to that point I was still in the back of my mind thinking something could happen that could delay me. But, nothing did. I read for two hours, slept an hour, and when I woke up, we were about 20 minutes away from landing. I raised my window shade and watched the brown land go by below me (wow, we are a parched land here in Oklahoma) trying to figure out exactly where we were. I saw a huge river, and what I think might have been Vinita, but I never was sure because you know how everything looks so different from that point of view. When we landed, I went straight to the bathroom and then to the baggage claim. It hadn't even come out yet and there was only one lady standing there. I don't know where everybody else was. When my bag came out, I grabbed it and I kid you not when I say it nearly dragged me onto the belt with it. It was so heavy it nearly yanked me out of my shoes. I finally got it off the belt and went out side and waited for the Fine Parking dude to come get me. He finally showed up and me and this other guy were his only riders. I got out my phone to turn it back on and it felt so weird, it wasn't even noon yet. It was like 11:53 or something. I got to my car and had to take off my hoodie before I could drive because it was so warm out. I paid the outrageous amount of money for them to let my car sit on their parking lot, and drove off. When I got out on the freeway I called Mike to let him know I was in Tulsa on my way home.


When I got home, the trash was taken out, and hauled off, kudos to Mike on that one. His laundry was all washed and dried, but sitting in a huge pile on the bed. My side of the bed. He had done his laundry then slept with it on my side of the bed for who knows how many nights. I was so tired, I wanted nothing but a nap, so I got on his side of the bed. YUCK! Crumbs! He had been eating in bed and it was full of crumbs. So, I got up, put away all his clean laundry, changed the sheets, and layed back down. Then Shael comes in and won't leave me alone, and then Mike gets home. So much for a nap.The next day I got up and took Shael to school, went to my parents and gave them the stuff from your parents, picked up Nikolas while I was there and went to Joplin to pay a bill I hadn't paid before leaving. I got back to Wyandotte in time to pick Shael up from school and go home. No nap again. Then that night we went to church. The next day, Thursday, I had a thing to go to for unemployment at 9:00 in the morning in Miami. After that I did some running about town with Valerie and Linda from the day care and we ate lunch together. I got back to Wyandotte in time to pick Shael up from school again. No nap again. Friday, Valerie and I went to Branson and spent the entire day at Silver Dollar City. No nap again. Saturday I spent the entire day trying to entertain Shael, do laundry, and general house cleaning. No nap again. Saturday night I had a complete mental melt down. That's a whole other story I'll have to wait till next time to explain. Sunday was HORRIBLE. Pastor appreciation day. Very emotionally stressful day, to say the least. I took Shael to see Flicka to try to get away from it all. Monday, I somehow can't even remember Monday very clearly. I was such an emotional mess, my eyes were puffy from crying so much, my throat felt raw, as did my heart. I called my mother in law and talked with her for about 45 minutes and felt better when I got off the phone. Tuesday, I invited Mike and his friend Cory over for lunch. I cooked like a maniac all morning Tuesday and they got here about 11:15. After lunch, they fixed a cabinet that had needed fixed for a couple weeks and they finally left around 1:00. I sat down to eat my dessert, and around 1:30 I felt myself crashing. I turned the music off, crawled into bed, and the next thing I knew it was 2:55. I got out of bed, took off to go pick Shael up and when I got home, I cooked supper, ate it and felt like going back to bed, but didn't. I waited up on Mike who was up at the garage trying to iron out last minute details before leaving for his hunting trip. Wednesday, repeat of Tuesday. Mike and Cory got here around 11:30, ate and left. Around 1:30 I started feeling it again. I crawled into bed and didn't know another thing until 5:30! I slept like a rock for 4 hours! It was great, except when I woke up this time I kind of felt like crap. When Mike got home I told him that I thought the last couple of weeks finally caught up with me. I paused for just a moment and something slammed into the back of me and knocked me down. It was my butt, catching up with me.


More Lyrics--I know you are all happy to see that

I know it's been a while, and it seems the most I do on here anymore is post an occasional song, but, I'll try to do better. I sent an in depth email about my trip back home to my anonymous friend, I don't think she'll mind if I copy and paste it onto here. It's all about me, not her, so she shouldn't have any trouble with that.
But, for now, I have two songs I want to post. The second song is going to have to wait a little bit, as I have to go find the words on line somewhere first, then post them. The first one is by one of my fav-or-ite bands, Reliant K. High of 75.
We were talking together I said, "What's up with this weather?"
Don't know whether or not how sad I just got was on my own volition or if I'm just missing the sun.
And tomorrow I know will be rainy at best and the forecast I know is that I'll be depressed. But I'll wait outside hoping that I'll catch sight of the sun.
Because on and off the clouds have fought for control over the sky. And lately the weather has been so bi-polar and consequently so have I.
But now I'm sunny with a high of 75. Since you took my heavy heart and made it light. And it's funny how you find you enjoy your life when you're happy to be alive.
And the temperature is freezing and then after the dark there's a cold front sweeping in over my heart. And we might break up if I don't wake up to the sun.