Fire up the grill

Yum. The first grilled burgers of the year. Today was so beautiful. What was the high today? 75? Perfect. The only thing about grilling on February 28 is that by the time that I got the coals just right, it was dark. I don't like grilling after the sun goes down. It seems that I either under or over cook it. I didn't do too bad this time. Guess I haven't lost my touch.
***********
Shael went back to the doctor yesterday for her 2 week ear check up. It's still infected. The amoxacillin didn't do a thing. So, she gave her a stronger antibiotic and told her she wanted to see her again in two weeks. Sheesh, why can't she just get normal sicknesses that clear up with meds in a week? She has to get these weird, obscure things that won't clear up easily and she has to keep coming back for check ups. Not that an ear infection is weird or obscure, but it should be cleared up by now. When I walked into pharmacy the pharmacist said "Okay, looks like she's built up an immunity to amoxacillin". I asked her how that could be since she's only taken it like 4 times (maybe) in her whole life and she's almost 12 (GASP). This is the first ear infection she's ever had in her life. I can understand immunity to antibiotics if she's on it 7 or 8 times a year, but that is not the case here. Hopefully this new antibiotic will do the trick.
***********
I have a funeral to go to tomorrow at the church. The man who sits behind me in church all the time went and died in his sleep Saturday night. His wife called the Pastors Sunday morning and told them that when she got up he was dead in bed with his arms crossed over his chest. Strange, huh?
***********
The girl who was shot by her boyfriend, her funeral is Thursday and the boyfriend's is Friday. I won't be going to those. The day care sent flowers for the girl's and we took up a collection for groceries for the guy's family because he's a Tribal member. The day care will also send flowers to his funeral. What a mess.
***********
I'm out of here. I'm going to go watch High School Musical with Shael. Mike took off to the bedroom to watch something else. He said watching musicals was too queer for him. Oh, well.
Ta!

How?

How do people without the hope of Glory cope with every day life? Like losing a 16 year old cousin in a car crash, or two men you just saw who both died unexpectedly two weeks apart, or the death of a father of 3 in another car crash, or the murder/suicide of two people you knew, whose house is right across the road from where you work. Like watching the police tape flapping in the hard wind. How do they do it? I'm so glad I have God and the hope of everlasting life when I leave this life.

I hope you do, too.

My Heart Hurts. Again.

This morning, there's a little boy waking up to face another day without his Daddy. And there's four little kids waking up to their very first day without their Mommy and Daddy. Last week, one of the Day Care's after school kids lost his Dad when his truck slid on ice and he went off the road, slammed into several trees and landed at the bottom of a big hill. He wasn't wearing a seat belt. Yesterday, four of our kids who haven't been in a while lost both their Mom and Dad in a murder/suicide. I knew something was wrong when I went in to work Friday morning and there on the side of the road attached to six telephone poles were the words "I will ...Always ....Love ....You ....(girl's first name) .....(girl's last name)". But, I had no idea this would happen. I found out last night at church and all I could do was cry. I'm not sure how old their oldest is, but the youngest is two. Someone said there were six kids counting his and theirs but I only know of five. He had a child by a previous marriage then they had four together. The kids are all real young because he was only 27 and she 25. I just saw him a week ago today. Trying to get his truck started by having it yanked all around the parking lot at the Day Care. God only knew that in six days he would be dead after fatally shooting the one he would love always.
Mercy, mercy, mercy.

It's ALL About ME

I had The Best day today. Shael is not going to be happy about it when she finds out I went to the mall without her. Mike went to play poker with his buddies and I went shopping. Shael is at her Grandma's house for the entire weekend. I went back to Best Buy and got me that Michael Buble cd I had my eye on last night. Thanks, Grand Lake Casino! I first heard Michael Buble on NPR in Kansas City 2-1/2 years ago. I knew right then and there that I wanted a cd. I couldn't find them for the longest time, though I never forgot that name or that voice. When I finally started seeing them in stores, I never really had the money to get one. Until today. I put it off no longer. I'm listening to it on my computer right now, and I can tell you one thing, the ladies at work are probably going to get sick of this cd because I have every intention of listening to it over and over for several days in a row.

I also made it to the mall, as I mentioned. I searched for some boots to wear on the motorcycle. I found some and snatched them up before someone else saw what a bargain they were. I got these $50 boots for $14.98 (that's with tax!) and I couldn't wait to tell Mike about my great catch. They don't quite have the right sole for biking boots, but they'll work, as all I ever do is sit on the back with my feet tucked up on some pegs anyway. No, putting my feet down on the pavement at every stop sign or light for me. Nope, I sit there all queenly and don't touch the ground until I get off the bike.

I saw Mike's boss's son (he's technically the boss, too, these days, but he's like 25 years old, if that) at Sears and I spoke to him. He didn't recognize me so I told him who I was. He apologized for not recognizing me and I laughed. No biggie, since he only sees me once a year, I told him. And what I was thinking but didn't voice was...and that one time a year I see you you are always so dang drunk I doubt if you even recognize your own mother. He's not as hot as he was when Mike first started working for them 6 years ago. Too many drinks and too many drugs. Too many women, too. He had this HOT girlfriend when Mike first started working there. A couple years later she became his HOT wife. A year later she became his HOT ex-wife. The guy is loaded and when she filed for divorce, she told him he could have it all she didn't want one thing. And she didn't take one thing. They'd just built this brand new home that was huge and he still lives in it. She must've been one unhappy HOT woman. And he must've been one unhappy husband because he spent all his time at the bar the whole time they were married. Now he's with this chick that is so not hot. She looks rough because she is. She was rubbing all over Mike one night at the bar back when Mike use to go. And any of you who know Mike know he's a big flirt. Please, ladies, do NOT encourage him.

I also went to Michael's craft store, Hobby Lobby and Books-A-Million today on my shopping spree that was all about me. At Books-A-Million I joined the discount club thingie and when the guy asked me what phone number I wanted it to go under I told him and he said "Quapaw, right?". Uh, no. Grove, I told him. He said "Oh, yeah, Grove. I'm from Wyandotte, myself" *sings It's A Small World After All* These days instead of asking people what their names are when they say they are from Wyandotte, I ask them how old they are. When this guy said 18, I went, "Oh, then I don't know you" Somehow, we started talking about people we both know and he mentioned this guy named Kenny Young. Yes, I know who he is, I think he's somewhere around my sister's age, and he said "Funny thing about Kenny Young. Most of the kids my age have partied with him." Okay, little bit of inside info here, Kenny Young is somewhere in his 40's. When he told me the kids his age have partied with him I gave an involuntary shudder and said "Eiw. He's the creepy, old guy at parties?" The boy laughed and I told him I refuse to ever be the creepy, old person at a party. I know I still feel like I'm 18 in my head, I still think 18, but I still walk around in the real world and am aware that I'm almost 33 so I try not to dress too young or speak too young or hang around with the too young crowd. Shoot, when I have to explain who freakin' John Lennin is, than forget it, get me a 30 something.

I bought me five new books. I had to leave before I spent too much. I got Plantation by Dorothea Benton Frank (another lowcountry tale, I love 'em), Suzanne's Diary for Nicholas by James Patterson (which says it's now a major CBS television event, but since I hardly ever watch CBS, except to watch CSI, I figure it won't be a problem), and then I bought three books I've read before but wanted to own. Two Nicholas Sparks, The Notebook and The Wedding and my old stand-by by Colleen McCullough, The Thorn Birds. Can you believe this is the first time I've ever owned a brand new copy of that book? I've only ever owned used paperbacks and my old, old, OLD, used hard back. All the books I got tonight were paperbacks. Which one should I read first. I think the James Patterson, then the lowcountry one, then The Notebook, The Wedding, then I'll savor The Thorn Birds for a month. Going over my favorite parts leisurely.

Mike took a coffee can with $25 worth of change to his poker game tonight. He gave it a shake when I picked him up tonight (I had to be the dd again, you know) and he still had some money in it, just don't know how much yet.

I had so much fun today, I almost hated for it to end. I can't even remember the last time I went shopping by myself, for myself. No groceries on the agenda. I discovered something about myself. Something I use to know, but had forgotten. I'm a very efficient shopper when I don't have Mike and/or Shael tagging along with me. When I don't have to spend more than half my time searching for Mike only to find him in the most obscure areas of the store or going four rows over from what I'm looking at trying to make my decision to go look at something Shael says I just "have to see". Seeing it and saying "that's amazing, Shael" and going back four rows to find 3 fat women standing in my spot, looking at my things and not in any hurry to move along so I can get back to what I was doing. I found that I could drive from Carl Junction to Joplin and going to Wal-Mart, Best Buy, the mall where I looked in four stores, actually bought something in two of the four stores, tried on two pairs of boots, then go on to Michael's then to Hobby Lobby all in 3 hours. I was in Hobby Lobby over an hour, too. Mike wasn't ready to go so that's why I went to Books-A-Million. I had to leave there or I'd spend every penny in my checking account and every bit of cash in my purse.

We got home by 8:30 and Mike went straight to bed. He's been up a whole 8 hours, poor baby, he should get some sleep. I slept in a little bit this morning, but still got up by 8:30 this morning. Maybe I can squeeze in a nap tomorrow after church. Before we go to pick up the kiddo. Before our nice, quiet home turns loud and rowdy again. Here's hoping.

And here's a nice close up. 

Look at the size of that thing!  

Here she is when the guy first started. I was hoping I'd get her making a face, but, she turned her head and covered up her mouth. As soon as I took it I realized, oops, that's probably not such a good idea with that flash on my camera. I didn't take any more until he was done. 

Academy Sports, Tattoo Parlor, & Casino

Thursday evening I worked 30 minutes late and Friday morning I went in 30 minutes early just so I could take off an hour early yesterday afternoon. Mike came by to pick me up on the bike at 4:00 and I was ready to go. I only had 2 babies all day yesterday and both of them were gone by 2:30 (talk about unusual, but, hey, I wasn't complaining). Instead of picking me up there, I told him to meet me at the casino so I could leave my car there instead of the day care. I was afraid that my car would get locked in when they locked the gates before I got back to it. Would be my luck, my car locked in for the entire weekend. So, my car sat at the casino while Mike and I took off on the bike for 4 hours.

We went to Joplin for the sole purpose of buying me some boots at academy Sports. Well, that didn't happen. They have squat for boots in women sizes. I tried kids and found nothing. I found some I really liked in men's but they didn't have any small enough for me. Walking out of there with nothing I was like "That blows", that's the first time I've even gone in that store and came out empty handed. So we went to Best Buy so Mike could finally use his gift card from Christmas. He got 2 cds (Frank Zappa and Metallica) and I got myself a Relient K cd. We couldn't get too much since we were on the bike.

I was so hungry, by then it was about 5:45 or 6:00 and that grilled cheese sandwich I'd eaten at 11:00 that morning was wearing off faster by the minute. One of the beauties of riding a motorcycle is the smells. Good and bad, it doesn't matter, you get them all. And going down Range Line I was getting all those smells of food. Not just food, but STEAKS. I wanted one by then. We ended up at Bella Peppers because I love their steaks and I love their salad dressing and I love their bread. Sop up that salad dressing with that bread. Yum, I could eat that as a complete meal. Anyway, we both got the special, steak with grilled shrimp on a bed of fetacini alfredo. Man, that was good food. But I couldn't eat all my steak, only about half of it. I asked for some foil to wrap it in and the waiter said "A carry out box?" and I told him, no, I needed some foil or something because it had to fit in the saddle bags. You should have seen the look on his face! It was priceless. His expression totally froze in that half smile as he repeated "hassss to fit. In the. Saddle bags. Ooookay." I'm thinking I should have taken my helmet in so he might have understood.

When we left there it was completely dark and you know what happens when the sun goes down. It gets cold! It wasn't too bad, there were a few spots where it was, I mean, it felt like the time I fell into the creek one winter while I was swinging from a vine and the dang vine broke. But, we made it home without any hypothermia.

Funny story before I go any further. We had been on the bike maybe 20 minutes when Mike mentions how much sand and salt is still on the shoulder of the road from the snow storm and we should try our hardest to avoid it because it could easily fling up and hit us, which hurts like a bitch, in Mike's words. It's not too good for the paint either. Then he starts talking about how he'd like to get me some floor boards instead of pegs for my feet and he reaches down and flips the peg from under my left foot up and asks me if it was more comfortable for my legs to be down a couple inches. Let's just say, no, not like that. As soon as my left leg hung down without anything to rest on, my right hip got this huge muscle cramp and I couldn't move my left leg to put the peg back down without it hurting but I had to get that peg down! I kept trying and trying until guess what, my left hip seized up too. Man, I was in severe pain! I tried to shift around where they'd quit cramping up but it was only making it worse. I tried to make it to a dirt road but I couldn't and finally had to smack Mike on the bike saying "OW SHIT OW SHIT PULL OVER PULL OVER!!!" He was like "What's the matter?" But I hit him pretty hard right between the shoulder blades and screamed "PULL OOOOVVVVEERRRRR!" That made a believer out of him that something was wrong so he pulled over immediately and I jumped off that bike faster than I ever have before. I had to walk around for a minute before I could get back on. He started laughing at me and said "You okay, old timer?" He later told my sister and her husband about it and said "I no sooner got the words out of my mouth about the sand and salt and she's screaming at me to pull over right in it!" My hips were sore for hours, too.

When we both finally got home, I layed in the floor and did some leg stretches for a few minutes then grabbed my camera and left. Mike said if I drove he'd go with me. We ended up at the tattoo parlor next to The Mill where my sister got her #3 tattoo. It took forever it seem for him to get it just right on paper so he could transfer it to her lower back. I'll post the pictures as soon as I get them from my camera to my computer. It's beautiful, but now, I don't know if I want to get my #3 because she got what I wanted. I've had my mind made up about it for 2 years, since I got #2, what I was going to get. I just hadn't decided where on my body I wanted it. Now, I'm wishing I would have gotten it instead of the dragon fly 2 years ago. She got a 3 leaf clover with a tiny bit of scroll work and her kids' names over each of the leaves. It is so pretty. But, that will seem like I'm copying if I get my 3 leaf clover now. There I thought I was wanting something original, that totally sucks. But my sister's is gorgeous, her kids are going to like it even.

From the tattoo parlor, we headed to the casino. By then it was 1:00 in the morning. Mike had wanted beer and had gone to the Filling Station to get some after The Mill closed. But he and my brother in law only got a 6 pack for the two of them. That didn't last long. The only reason we waited around so long at the tattoo place was because we'd planned on going to the casino with them when they got done. We were at that tattoo place for FOUR HOURS! It took so long for Roni's to get just right on paper, then it really did take a long time to actually do it, it's no small clover. Then one of the girls that came with them got a dragon fly on her shoulder and we waited around on her, too. It didn't take very long at all for hers to go on. So, there we were at 1:00 just walking in to the casino. We've never been there at that time before. It was pretty nice, actually. Not too crowded. But, beer consumption ended at 2:00. In that hour, Mike downed 5 drafts. My sister's friends left right away, I don't even know why they bothered to drive there and walk in. But we stayed until they wouldn't sell Mike and Kelly anymore beer. In fact, one of the workers stood there to make sure Mike got rid of his last beer, she was wanting to take it away from him because when she walked up and told him it he had no more time left and all beer had to be off the floor right then she had her hand out. Mike looked at her and said he bought it he'd by golly drink it. So, ziggy zoggy ziggy zoggy oi oi oi and gulp, it was gone. The woman just looked at him, shrugged her shoulders turned around and started to walk off. Mike said "Hey!" and she turned back around and he handed her his empty and said "There you go". Wasn't that nice of him?

I won $79. The most I've ever won! I was so proud of myself. I actually spent $20 to begin with so I really only won $59. But still 59 bucks! Woo-hoo! Mike didn't win squat. The only thing he got was a buzz. Don't worry, I was driving.

I almost forgot the funniest thing that happened to me. When Roni was getting her tattoo, I was still wearing my bike riding garb. I was getting hot. I had on a t-shirt, a long sleeve shirt, a vest, a pair of thermal underwear and wind pants. And I had serious helmet hair so I put on my favorite hat. (It was the first time I'd worn my helmet since I got my hair cut and it fit different) First to come off was the vest. Then I took of my long sleeve shirt and put the vest back on over the t-shirt because the t-shirt was a little on the tight side, I don't usually wear it without something over it. But I was still smothering. So, I decided those thermal underwear had to go. I was too embarrassed to go to the bathroom to take them off then carry them through the building in front of everybody so I opted for going to the car and taking them off there. It was getting cold outside so I tried to hurry. The stupid light stayed on until I was almost finished so it felt like I was in the spot light. Finally, I got them off and I wadded them up and put them in the back seat and started back in. I get to the front door, open it up and when I happened to glance down at my feet, I notice something white. It was the leg of my long underwear. It seems they were tucked in the back of my wind pants still. I only thought I'd put them in the back seat. They were on my back seat. I heard Mike and Kelly laughing real hard, I laughed and slammed the door shut and yanked them out real quick. They were really tucked in good, too. I had a tail. And it was white and thermal. I put them in the car and came back in laughing so hard I could hardly see. I finally got the story out and they all said they hadn't seen me, just heard me open the door, laugh then shut it back. They were laughing at something on the TV. Jackass, I think. Man, I even made the tattoo artist laugh pretty good at that one. I didn't want to carry them in my hand across the room in front of everybody, but I almost carried them across the room hanging out the back of my pants.

Geez.

God Does NOT Hate Fags

My goodness. I cannot believe what I've been reading. Can you? Seems there's this nice little group of people in Topeka, KS calling themselves the "Westboro Baptist Church" who are protesting military funerals. One which happened right here in Miami. Isn't that the saddest thing you've ever heard? This boy, who died in Iraq a few weeks ago, his family in mourning, couldn't even have a normal funeral because these freaks protested. I don't care if you are against the war, you don't protest at a funeral, people! N, you are the most anti war, anti Bush person I know, would you protest at a Marine's funeral? Didn't think so. That boy's poor family, I feel so bad for them.
These people, these "Baptists" (I'm sure real Baptists are cringing at the thought of sharing a name with these people) are some severe homophobes. Now, you know me, I think homosexuality is wrong. Is it not the way God designed the human race, I don't care what scientists are saying these days. I still believe that God loves these homosexuals just as much as He loves me. Every single person on the face of this earth, He loves. It's unfathomable to my little pea brain to think that He loves terrorists as much as He loves me. He loves us all. He wants us all. It is not His "Chosen Elect" who are loved by Him. But here comes the deal. We have to chose Him. If we confess with our mouths and believe in our hearts then we are saved. Even if we had been a "sodomite" for 35 years, if we pray to God, He hears us. He'll save us. This is at once a simple concept and an nonunderstandable concept. Part of me says "This is the most simple concept in the world! How do people get so deceived when the truth is plain and simple. God Loves YOU. God loves the whole world. For God so loved the WORLD that He gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believes in Him shall not perish but have everlasting life. What is so hard about that? What is hard about that is How? How can God love me when I've sinned so greatly? How can God love Bin Laden when he's truly an evil man? Because God so loved the WORLD. You parents look at your own children. How much do you love them, even when they sin? Nothing they can say or do can separate you from that love you have for them. How much more does our Heavenly Father love us?
My, my, my, my, my. I was looking on the on line paper about this boy's funeral. I found the web site to this group. Their web address was god hates fags dot com. Not to intentionally advertise for them, though I know I am, just by mentioning them, but I had to go check out what this group was all about. I was angered, outraged, and mostly saddened by what I found. To quote Woody "You're a sad, strange little man".

I'll try to fix this to look prettier later, k?
Never the original, I saw this and thought it was cool.
http://kevan.org/johari?view=Methinksgreen

Here's hoping it works. I'm having difficulties with links for some stupid reason. It's me, I know.

Snow People

When I got home last night Shael had made a snowman right on the spot where I park. I didn't run over him, but I laughed about it because it was all of 3 feet tall and was complete with stick arms and rock eyes, nose, and buttons. It had a big dead oak leaf for a mouth and a flower tucked behind it's "ear". My jonquils had already bloomed and surprisingly they survived the 5 inches of snow. Shael met me at the front door and before she could say anything I told her I'd seen her snowman. She told me that she'd made another one in the back yard so I walked around to look at it, too. When I got back there, she met me and told me that the one in the front yard was female and the one in the back yard was male. I asked her how she could tell the difference. Snow balls?
Turns out it was the flower in the hair that made the difference.

Mmmm...That Felt Good

I slept for 8 hours last night! Yay! While it wasn't totally uninterrupted sleep, it was close enough. I woke up once coughing and got up and got a drink straight out of the bathroom sink (no cup, just my hand) and about froze my hand in the process. When I got back to bed I realized how hot it was in there. I stripped off my sweats and then my socks and didn't cover up. I went right back to sleep. A little later I woke up cold so I covered up. The next thing I know, Mike is getting up and it's almost 5:30. I should go to bed early more often.

I HATE SNOW

Let's just say I left for work 15 minutes early this morning and clocked in 19 minutes late. I didn't wreck, I didn't hit the ditch. But, I had some trouble concerning icy conditions. I was so scared and I was praying as hard as I have ever prayed in my life. God answered my prayers and sent two nice men that stopped and helped me. One was my next door neighbor, Chuck. Thanks, dudes.

Snow day

I really don't want to go back to work today. After two days of doing practically nothing, it's going to be hard to go back and do practically nothing at my job. I'm scared to death to drive on these roads. I don't know what they look like now, but Saturday they were horrible. Slick, people were going off the road all over the place. It's not the snow, but the ice I'm worried about. Slick patches that you don't know are slick until you find yourself in a ditch. Two years ago I had two wrecks on ice. Nine days apart. Different vehicles. I totaled my Blazer and gave Mike an opportunity to get a new door on his Jimmy. At least it's green. The door, that is. The rest of the truck is white. Thanks to those two incidents, I've developed this phobia about driving on anything besides dry pavement. Even on dry pavement sometimes I feel anxiety trying to shove it's way into my throat. I can envision myself hurling my car down a steep embankment, or flying off the road and into the lake when I'm going around that curve. Sometimes I wonder if I have a mild case of turret's syndrome. I do click my teeth when I drive by a telephone pole. That's a lot of teeth clicking.
Yesterday I didn't even step foot outside all day long. Only one foot went out the back door when I reached out for the dog's food dish to feed him. That's the closest I came to being out of doors. Mike took care of the fire all day so I didn't have to mess with that. A Sunday where I stayed home all day is something that has not been done much in my entire life. I've gone to the same church since I was 3 years old. Now, I teach the 3 year olds. 2 & 3's, really. I have to be honest, some days, that class and those kids are the only reason I get up out of bed and get myself around and go to church. It can be really hard when you've got a man beside you in bed that's pulling on you and asking you to stay home with him. He doesn't seem to realize that he has every Saturday to lounge around in bed or at home all day and I'll be happy to stay home with him. Instead, he's up and ready to go to some car show, or boat show, or gun show. Or fishing, or hunting. Seems there's always something. Then on Sundays it's "Stay home! Just call and tell them you won't be there, someone will teach your class".

We weren't even sure if Shael had scheduled school today, anyway. Mike went ahead and took her to my parents house, even if she didn't have school, she can stay there all day and he can pick her up on his way home tonight. We'd heard somewhere that her school was letting out today but we weren't sure if it was a rumor or not. I guess she'll find out when the bus either goes by or doesn't. I told him to call me and tell me what the roads were like. I could have rode with him and been at work 2-1/2 hours early, and I seriously considered that. But, I didn't do it in the end. I couldn't stand to be at that place for more than my allotted 8 hours. The last thing Mike said to me was "If you do go somewhere, make sure you don't drive the Suburban. We don't have full coverage on it". Thanks for the vote of confidence.

Let It Snow!

Shael and I were on our way to Joplin last night (Mike didn't want to go) when it started sleeting. I went on in to Seneca, got gas, stopped at the store and got some ice cream for Mike then came home. So much for Hobby Lobby. I was so disappointed. When we got home I was all bitchy so I sat in my bedroom and watched Hot Shots Part deux. Then I went to sleep. Woo-hoo, how exciting. I woke up at 11:30 needing to use the bathroom so I got up, happened to look out the bedroom window on my way to the bathroom and Holy Cow! There was snow on the ground, and deep. And it was still coming down hard. Mike had kind stirred when I got up and he asked me what the deal was and I said the one word you don't hear much around here: "snow". Then I went in to check the fire and lo and behold it needed wood. Imagine that. I'd already used up the tiny bit I'd brought in earlier so I got bundled up and went outside to get some more logs for the fire. The snow was already deep enough to make me have to push the screen door pretty hard to get it to open. What I saw made me scream. At 11:40 I was standing out on the back porch (which is really just a stoop) screaming my head off while Shael was out there running around like a dang fool saying "IT'S SNOWING! IT'S SNOWING! IT'S SNOWING!" It seems when Mike went out to the wood pile with the 4 wheeler to grab up some wood to stack up next to the house, he just threw the tarp back and didn't mess with putting it back on. There was at least 2 inches of fresh snow on every piece of wood there. So, picture me out there, getting close to midnight, in my sweats and Mike's boots, near blizzard like conditions, screaming and griping and dusting off as much snow as I can and grabbing up the tarp, shaking it like a dirty rug then putting it back on. The whole time Shael acting like she'd never seen snow before in her life, Mike coming to the back door in his shorts (and if he had hair it would have been standing on end) rubbing his face saying, all groggy, "What's going on?". I wanted to scream at him "WHAT THE HELL DO YOU THINK IS GOING ON?" But, I didn't. I just glared. Shook the tarp a few more times, placed it over the still snow encrusted wood, grabbed up a few of the less wet pieces and brought them into the house without saying a word. He gets up at 2:30 and uses the wood I had brought in so when I got up at 5:48 I had to go outside again to get wood. Funny how it works out that way, huh?

Today has been not much better. Much frustration over the fact that there's a stack of dirty dishes in the sink, even after the dishwasher was ran, clean laundry overflowing in the laundry basket because no one has put it away, and a general messiness around the entire house. The frustration stems from the fact that I seem to be the only person in this house who cares or even notices these things. One time today when I was checking the fire, I looked in and the coals were all big and pretty and I mentioned that they were like jewels and they made me want to pick them up. Mike told me to go ahead and I said back, dryly, "Yeah, right. If I did that, I wouldn't be able to fix you food to eat". Instead of laughing he said "Ooo, better not touch them then, cause that would be bad".

Must. Remember. Why. I. Married. This. Man.

Oh What A Night

Late December back in '63. Oh, wait, I'm singing in my head again and it manifested itself on my blog. Sorry 'bout that.

I did have quite a night last night. It was a success. Something in Miami didn't blow. That's twice now, lately that I've done something in Miami and it wasn't the usual hokey Miami crap. Wow, they must be getting better, or something.
Anyway, we went to the Quapaw Casino for our candle lit dinner for two. The beef coins were good, the wine sauce was okay. It tasted mostly like brown gravy made with red wine. I could taste the wine flavoring but it wasn't so overpowering where I didn't like it. When we first sat down the waitress asked us what we would like to drink, we gave her pop orders and she went off and got us our drinks. When she came back she asked us what kind of dressing we'd like on our salads. Mike asked her if they had Ott's and she looked at him oddly then said no. So he ordered Ranch. I ordered French, because I prefer red French over Ott's anyway. We got our salads, and Mike's was Ranch and mine was Ott's. Lol. She was young, she probably didn't know there was a difference between Ott's and French. I didn't use to. Use to be around here, when you ordered French, Ott's is what you got every time. You don't see that very often anymore. Mike and I traded salads so he could have his Ott's. I'm nice to him that way.
The place looked very elegant. The silverware was all laid out complete with a salad fork, a dinner fork, and a dessert fork. Then on the other side was the steak knife, butter knife and spoon. I had to tell Mike what fork to use, but really, no one was watching, and even if they were, no one would have known any better or even cared if he would have used the wrong fork. In fact, the place looked so elegant, I felt like I should use my most polite of table manners. No, laughing loud or talking loud enough for people four tables over to overhear. Wait, I don't ever do that anyway. But, anyway, you catch my drift. I sat up straight, I used the correct fork, I dabbed at my mouth with my linen napkin. Then, I saw this old man at the table next to us light up his cigarette with the candle and that was it. I felt it was a waste of time.
After our salad and steaks with baked potatoes, we had the most delicious strawberry cheesecake. Man, it was good. Then they gave us our free play, $10 a piece, and we went out to the casino part and cashed them in. I didn't spend mine, I just tucked my 10 bucks in my wallet. Mike spent 5 of his and then we left. It was getting crowded in there because they were getting ready for their birthday drawing. We headed on out to Wyandotte's casino and played for maybe 10 minutes. Mike played his other $5 and walked out with $10 and I played my whole $10 and walked out with $9. So, they got me for a dollar, but hey, it was given to me, so it wasn't too heart breaking.
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I'm so glad it Friday. I think I say something of the sort every week. It's also pay day and I'm going to go to Hobby Lobby and spend some of my hard earned cash. I wanted to Sunday, but I used my "wisdom to handle money" and didn't go. It was hard, I really wanted to go and get that stuff that I'd seen Friday night. But, I held off, knowing that I got paid this week. So, I'm off to Joplin tonight. It's funny, I go 6 or 8 months without setting foot anywhere near Joplin, then all of a sudden, I go a lot. If I go tonight (which I'm sure hoping I get to) it will be the 3rd time in 7 days.
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Today would have been my cousin Bobbi's 17th birthday. May she rest in peace and may her Mother just have peace.

Ha!

My sister sent me this and I thought it was too good to pass up sharing it with my blog readers.

An old Indian chief sat in his hut on the reservation, smoking a Ceremonial pipe and eyeing two U.S. government officials sent to interview him.

"Chief Two Eagles" asked one official, "You have observed the white man for 90 years. You've seen his wars and his technological advances. You've seen his progress, and the damage he's done."

The Chief nodded in agreement.

The official continued, "Considering all these events, in your opinion, where did the white man go wrong?"

The Chief stared at the government officials for over a minute and then calmly replied ..

"When white man found the land, Indians were running it.

No taxes,No debt,Plenty buffalo,Plenty beaver,Women did all the work,Medicine man free,Indian man spent all day hunting and fishing,All night having sex."Then the chief leaned back and smiled …
"Only white man dumb enough to think he could improve system like that."

Love Is In The Air

Tonight is our post Valentine's night out. Fun at the casino, what else? When Mike got the letter from Quapaw Casino about the candle lit dinner for two and $20 free play, he was all over it. Called to make a reservation right away. But, it was already filled up. They only took the first 50 couples. But wait! They said. Because it was such a hit, they were extending it to Thursday the 16th. Two nights of candle lit dinner and $20 free play. So, we're going tonight. This ought to be a trip.
We were unintentionally out and about in Joplin on Valentine's night. We even went out to eat while we were there! All the mainstream places like Red Lobster, Applebee's, and Olive Garden were filled to capacity with people standing outside waiting to get in. We ate at Maria's, a Mexican joint over on 32nd where Cafe Santa Fe use to be. I can't put my finger on it, but the place seems dumpier than it use to when it was Cafe Santa Fe, but the food. Oh, the FOOD! It was goooood. I had a fajita salad and the fajitas were so good, I wouldn't have minded one bit to have just the steak, uncut. Yummy.
Tonight we're to eat beef coins in wine sauce. We'll see. By coins, they probably mean the steaks are the size of quarters and I don't usually like anything in wine sauce. I'm hoping it's good. If not, there's always the baked potato or the snack bar later. lol
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Diva, if I could sleep 9 hours straight, I would be a happy woman. I would have to go to bed by 8:30 to get that. Well, that's not happening. But, this morning, I did get a nap in. If you can call it that when it's between 6:15 and 7:00 a.m. I dozed in and out for 45 minutes. I could hear the weather channel most of the time, so it wasn't a good hard sleep, but my eyes were shut and I was relaxed. I was afraid to turn the light off because I knew I'd oversleep if I did. I think that extra 45 minutes of sleep totally blew my chances of getting a load of jeans washed. That sucks, but it was worth it. I'll have to wash them some time today so Mike will have some to wear to work tomorrow. Maybe I can squeeze them in before I leave and do a major no-no and leave the dryer running when I go to work. If there weren't chances of rain and/or snow, I'd hang them out on the line. But, knowing my luck, I'd get home and there would be an inch of snow stacked on top of them. Or they would be frozen stiff, or it would be pouring down rain. It's not quite clothes line weather yet, but close. I could have used it in January it was so warm. Not February, so far. Next month I will use it, I'm sure. I can hardly wait.
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I am off to get ready for work. Where I'll only have my 3 girls. They are usually fairly easy to take care of. One of them is gaining a Queenly attitude as she learns to walk. I need to inform her that the title "Queen of Everything" is already taken. She likes to look at me a smile her most charming smile while the whole time she is doing something she knows she's not suppose to do. As she is finding out the hard way, charm does not work with me. A baby can't get too far on charm in my classroom. Poor thing. One of the other girls is just starting to take her first steps. Talk about precious. She doesn't have the queenly attitude, she just has attitude. A temper to rival any red headed Irish lass. She's basically a sweet, cute little girl, but when it strikes her to throw a fit, wow, that girl can throw a huge tantrum. She's not even 9 months old yet. I have to show her every once in a while who's stronger. She may be strong, but I'm still stronger. My other little girl is still a little baby. Although, she's getting bigger everyday, she doesn't sit up yet, so her days consist of sleeping and playing with a mobile while she's on her back. Or sometimes I put her in the swing. She likes to be held a lot, and of course I oblige her that. She was a very sick little baby last week and her Mom had to come pick her up. Turns out she had a double ear infection and a sinus infection. Poor baby! No wonder she was sick. Now she has this yucky green goop coming out of her eyes and when I clean her up she gets howling mad. My little boy who won't be there today is the thorn in my side. He's huge. He's lazy. He's not very cute. He's 10 months old and the boy won't even attempt to crawl. He just sits there, spazing out, and screams until someone comes and picks him up. You can't entertain him, he can't entertain himself. He won't sleep very much so he's cranky. He won't even feed himself things like cheerios or crackers. He's so heavy, and he's the kind of kid who doesn't latch on to you when you pick him up, so he's like carrying around a 30 pound round ball. He doesn't come on Tuesdays and Thursday, my favorite days of the week now. He's also the boss's son. Yay.
Oh, I went to Jack & Jill's yesterday to say hi to everyone. It nearly made me want to cry when my old babies didn't remember me. I knew it would happen, but that didn't make it any easier for me when it did. It's amazing how they can go from being so attached to me that they cry when I leave their presence to not even recognizing me at all in such a short period. I probably won't ever go back now. That was too hard.
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Dang, now I really need to go get ready for work. I've wasted enough time on here that I've only got 40 minutes to get myself around. Laters!

So. Sleepy.

I can't seem to get caught up on my sleep. Aunt Flo left, after only staying 7 days. Nice of her to only stay a week. There's been times she's stayed for weeks or even months at a time. Yuck. But, now, after all traces of insomnia are gone, I'm way behind on my z's. I go to bed and fall asleep immediately and don't wake up until I hear Mike getting up at 5:30. Sometimes I'm even still in the same position that I was in when I fell asleep. I'm not hearing the alarm go off at 5:00 (yes, it drives me nuts that he sets the alarm for 30 minutes before he gets up) I'm not waking up to go put a log on the fire in the middle of the night so when we get up at 5:30 the fire is all but history. I got 7 hours of sleep last night and I feel like I could've slept a couple more hours. I did not want to get out of bed this morning. In fact, I'm seriously considering going back to bed.
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I've been listening to Revolution on Sirius a lot lately. It's Christian Rock. Some of the songs they play are a little too hard for me so I switch it back to Spirit, which is contemporary Christian. But after listening to the harder stuff for so long now, the lighter stuff is almost irritating. If Michael W. Smith is playing, I switch it to 80's or something else. For some reason I don't like his music. I feel that any song he releases gets mega play time whether it's good or not, just because of who it is. He could release a fart and it would soar to the top of the charts. "And the #1 song on 20 The Countdown Magazine is once again, Passed Gas, by Michael W. Smith"

So, anyway, where I was going with that. I had to meet Mike in Joplin last night so he could get his bike worked on (recall work) and on the way up there I heard this song that cracked me up. I hear this band all the time, and each time I have to laugh because the idea seems so unlikely yet it works. I told Mike if The Beasty Boys and Chicago were to get saved, then blend their bands together, you'd get the O.C. Supertones. But, on the way home, I heard another song by them and they sounded more like Chicago meets Fall Out Boy. Slammin' guitars with horns. Who woulda thunk it? But, like I said, it works. I like them.

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I'm hungry but I don't want to fix myself breakfast. Oh, Jeeves, start my grits for me. I like them with butter and sugar. Oh, wait, I don't have servants. Guess I'll have to go slave over my microwave and make my own grits. Yes, I know, from watching My Cousin Vinnie that no self respecting Southerner would make instant grits. That makes me a self respecting Okie. Because I make instant grits and enjoy every bite.

Ta!

I'm Sorry

To those girlfriends that I stood up at the Buffalo, I apologize. I worked over an hour today, rushed home to change out of my scrubs and to add a splash of perfume to help cover up any day care odors lingering on me (like the cigarette smoke wouldn't right?), checked my email to make sure I had the day and the time right then took off again to make it to Miami. I was actually running early, so I stopped at the garage where I saw Mike and Shael and looked at the new sissy bar Mike had made for his bike. Not bad, I just hope all that fringe doesn't slap the crap out of me as we're cruising down the highway. Anyway, I left there and just had this feeling I should call Diva and make sure all was still on. Boy, am I glad I did. Seems she has a butt load of Girl Scout cookies delivered at 6:30 she had to take care of so was going to be late, and another friend had to work an hour later than she expected so she was going to be late. Turns out they were all going to be there around 8:30. I'm sorry girls, but, I'm too far away to start my Monday evening at 8:30. Had you all volunteered to come down to the Grand Lake Casino, I would've been there in a heart beat. It takes me about 45 minutes to get to the Buffalo and I knew I'd be there a while even if I planned on staying only a little bit. So, I turned around and came home. I picked Shael up at the garage because she was driving Mike batty and took her home with me. I didn't even cook supper when I got home, we just ate left over pizza.

So, my impromptu ladies night was a bust. But, that's okay. My head hurts pretty bad, anyway. I'm really sorry about missing the girls. I haven't done anything with them in so long, I miss it. And I miss them. Maybe next time, okay? Don't forget to invite me again!

Let the Week Begin

Am I ready to start the week all over again? I'm not sure. But, at least this week has a payday at the end of it. I'm still getting use to getting paid only every other week.
Yesterday for church, I felt compelled to wear lots of dark eye liner and mascara only. I think it had something to do with my dark mood and the fact that my eyes were sort of puffy from the all the crying I'd done over the last couple of days. So, I go to church, come home to grab some gas money after church then Shael and I take off to Miami to deliver some candy bars that she'd sold for a fund raiser in her youth group. (I'm still in disbelief that my daughter is in the youth group at church, she should still be in my class and I teach the 2 & 3 year olds) On the way to Miami, my back starts with the little twinge that means an evening of misery and discomfort. Sure enough, by the time I got home I was hurting pretty bad. I oozed out of my car and walked into the house with a limp. I stayed home from church and watched Rambo on AMC. DVD on TV last night. Mike doesn't like that because he doesn't want to read while trying to watch a movie. I guess there's lots of people like that because they show the movie by itself first, then play the movie again with all the trivia. I was in and out watching both times. When I got up to go to the bathroom I got a glimpse of myself in the mirror and I just about fell over backwards. My eyes! What started out as dramatic black eyeliner and mascara had turned into a quasi-goth look. All I needed was black fingernail polish and some baby powder on my face and the look would have been complete. I laughed and went to Mike and told him I looked like the lead singer of Greenday and he hadn't even said a word. Even my hair was standing up on all ends. Guess I was on Holiday! ha! Pun totally intended.
I'd better get going, I've got a little over 30 minutes to get myself around. I've wasted all morning now it's time to get cracking. Mike nor I got up to put wood on the fire so it was frigid in the house this morning so I didn't want to get up at all. I finally crawled out of my warm cozy bed around 6:05 and stood next to the stove until my back warmed up. Mike had stoked the fire back up for me. Then I watched Mona Lisa Smile because the first time I watched it I missed the ending. I wasn't sure how much I missed so I watched the remaining 1:11 of it. Turns out, I'd only missed about 10 minutes of the end. Go figure. I watch an hour and 11 minutes of a movie only to see the last 10 minutes. I didn't think it was good enough to watch twice, that's for sure. Now, it's almost 8:00 and I have to get my butt in gear. Have a non-Monday-ish Monday, ya hear?

This Was Some Week

I'm glad it's over. Monday night was the only night this week that I was home. Tuesday night I went to the tribe's business committee meeting. Such entertainment. The new chief has sectioned himself off just enough rope to hang himself. What a fine job of doing so, I must say. Wednesday is church night. While I didn't go, Mike was sweet enough to take Shael for me then we later went into town to pick her up. He told me to just stay home if I didn't feel good (which I didn't) but I told him I had to buy some tampons and he looked at me real quick and said "Oh, well, you'd better go, then". (A little rabbit trail here. Has anyone seen, or used, those Instead things? They work like a diaphram, only to keep stuff from coming out instead of going in. It says you can wear them for 12 hours. OMG! I would be so sick feeling in 12 hours and then taking it out....oh, I won't even go there. That's just sick!)

Thursday we all three went to my Aunt Neasy's house. One of my Dad's younger sisters. It was her daughter that was killed in that wreck between vo-tech and Miami. Bobbi was 16, only eight days away from her 17th birthday. The house was packed with family and friends. Lots of teenagers there. We ate there (I've never seen so much food in one place outside of a Western Sizzlin') then Mike went outside with my Dad and most of the men. One of the Indian customs is to build a fire at the house where the body is and to not let it go out until the body leaves the house. So, Mike and most of the men were hanging around out by the fire and Shael and I went to the living room and sat with the body for a while with one of my cousins, my Mom and three of my other Aunts. Four more of the Aunts were sitting in the kitchen and my Aunt Neasy was hiding out upstairs. She came down right as we were leaving and I gave her a hug and nearly choked. Yesterday was the funeral. When we were coming home Thursday night, Shael complained of an ear ache, so before the funeral I took her to the doctor. We sat and sat and sat until finally I had to go so I wouldn't be late for the funeral. I called my mother in law and she, once again, came to my rescue. She sat at the doctor's office with Shael so I could go on. Mike was kind of miffed at me for not making Shael come along with us to the funeral, but I didn't know when I would get another chance to take her and I didn't want her to get even sicker over the weekend. I was worried that we wouldn't be able to find a seat, but they had the whole middle section of the huge church reserved for family. The church was full, every seat taken, and the walls were lined with people standing, the lobby was crowded with people who couldn't even get in to the sanctuary. The parking lot was completely full and cars were parked down every side street for many blocks. Aunt Neasy was practically carried into the church, he feet were literally dragging as her husband and her best friend were holding her up and walking her to her seat. Seeing the casket the night before, seeing it again yesterday and seeing all her baby pictures and pictures of her as she'd grown they'd made a collage out of on a table in the lobby didn't move me to tears, but seeing my Aunt Neasy like that felt like a stab in my heart. The preacher did a good job, it seems his girls were friends with Bobbi so he was directly affected and he choked up more than once. After the church we went on to the cemetery and waited on the hearse and the family car. We knew if we followed behind it like normal, we'd never find a place to park and by the time we made it to the tent the service would be over. But, we shouldn't have worried because it took them a while to get things started once everyone got there. Here was the Indian ceremony. The kind of funeral I'm accustomed to. The prayer in our native language (and he was nice enough to tell us in English what all was being said for the sake of all the non Indians there, I guess), the song, the sad, sad, ballad that made me cry and even sob a couple times, sang in the same language and accompanied by a small leather drum and two shakers. Hearing those four men sing sent chills down my spine that had nothing to do with the cold wind blowing. Then a man grabbed a shovel and scooped up dirt and all who wanted to walked by and grabbed a handful and dropped it over the lowered casket. The man holding the shovel was wearing a suit. I thought that seemed odd. A first for me. I don't even know who he was, he looked like one of the funeral home people. My Dad was a pall bearer so on the way back he rode with me and Mike. He wondered out loud what all of Rob's (Bobbi's Dad) family thought of the Indian ceremony. A half white half Indian funeral. Another first for me. Mike said that if anything, God forbid, ever happened to Shael, that's how he would want it for her, too. Mine will be all Indian. Mike's all white.

After the funeral we went to Joplin because Mike was looking for some leather to make something for his bike. Instead of paying $200 for a sissy bar, he wanted to try his hand at making one. We finally found leather at the third place we looked, which was the first place he said he wanted to look. Hobby Lobby. The whole evening Mike was in the best of moods. I guess the funeral kind of made him look at what he had and gave him some perspective in life. I, on the other hand, can't seem to shake this melancholy feeling. I'm really sad about my cousin, Bobbi, but I really didn't know her. I'm mostly concerned with my Aunt. And her other two daughters. I know that life goes on, they will make it. But, how? How does one go on after something like this? How will her sister, Sara, be able to close her eyes at night after seeing her sister dead on the highway? I won't even tell you how she described her because it's too gruesome. I didn't even see her yet I feel haunted by images described to me. Why did they tell me that, I wonder. How can they go on? They just will, is all I can think. Just like every body else who's lost a loved one suddenly and tragically like this. Almost five years to the day, my cousin, Janey, was killed in a car wreck. Janey was 7 when she died. Her mother's only child. What would I do if my only child, Shael, were killed? I don't know if I could go on. But my Aunt George Ann did. And was there for her sister when her daughter died 5 years and 1 day later.

So, I didn't get to have my utopian evening home alone after all. But that's okay. It turns out that Shael had an ear infection and by the time we got home from Joplin last night she was feeling right poorly. She fell asleep on the way home and when we pulled into the driveway I looked over at her, sound asleep in the passenger seat (Mike had driven separately since we met at the funeral rather than drive together) and thought, this is my child, as I tried to memorize every single freckle on her face. Every tooth in her head, because her mouth was wide open in slumber. She looked so precious. Then she wakes up, smacks her mouth a couple times, looks over at me with groggy eyes and burps. "Are we home?" she asks. "Yes, my love. We're home"

Oh, yeah

I HAVE to add another movie to my romantic list. A Walk In The Clouds. I must have a thing for movies with the words "sleep" and "walk" in them. Before we moved I use to go into Seneca and rent movies a lot and this movie was one of my regulars. The lady told me that I could have bought it for the price that I'd paid on rental fees. She also said I was about the only one who ever rented it. I almost wore that tape out!
A Walk In The Clouds. Keanu Reeves at his best. My heart races every time during the "crush the grapes" scene. I'm so corny, I know.

Thursdays are good. CSI

I feel like such a Ma Ingles. This morning I sewed up a big split up the side of Shael's jeans, hemmed another pair of pants, put wood on the fire and cooked my breakfast. All before 6:30. It doesn't matter that I had a sewing machine instead of sewing it by hand, or that a gas powered wood splitter split all the wood that Mike had cut down with a gas powered chain saw, or that my breakfast was instant oatmeal and all I had to do was boil water. If Ma Ingles would have had all that available, you bet you bottom dollar she would've used them.

Shael's pants were done by 5:45 because she wanted to wear them today and her and Mike leave by 6:00. I finally got all the kinks worked out on my sewing machine. I knew letting it sit for 5 weeks would fix everything. That's our philosophy. If banging it on the side doesn't help, let it sit for 5 weeks. And if it still doesn't work, throw it away. Let some poor dumpster diver find out that it doesn't work. The sewing machine wouldn't have gotten thrown away. It's brand new. It would have been sent back with a little note reading "Keep you sorry piece of junk. I want my money back" Not really, but I like to talk smack.

Tomorrow's Friday! Not payday for me, unfortunately, but still, it's Friday! The day before Saturday. So, that means that today is the day before the day before Saturday. Mike said something about going to the fights Friday night. I can send Shael to one of her grandparents' and that will leave me all alone. Alone to eat cookie dough right out of the bowl without someone saying "Hey! Are there going to be any cookies left to bake?" Hell, no! You don't want to get between a menstrual woman and her cookie dough, now do you? Alone to watch an incredibly sappy chick flick and cry when I want to without feeling self conscious when I sniff. No fear of being made fun of for crying at a silly movie. No whoops or cat calls or hearing the words "GET HER! GET HER!" when a love scene comes on. No questions during the movie about who this guy was or wasn't that the same girl that was kissing some other guy earlier in the movie. Bliss. Utopia. Nirvana.

Have a good day, everybody!

I just want to sleeeeeep

Five hours of sleep a night is sufficient for some people. I am not one of these people. I've been getting around 7 hours of sleep (which still isn't enough for me) and it's been restless sleep. That means when I wake up I feel like I haven't even gone to bed. Aunt Flo came to visit me yesterday and everything started making sense to me. Restless nights (insomnia is always a problems for me when she visits) being the most annoying symptom. She's not been around for four months. She's getting better because it use to be only every six months. Last night I went to bed around 11:00 and woke up at 4:00. I've been pretty tired all day today. I got all four of my babies to sleep around 10:00 and then I sat down to read my Bible. I read the entire book of James then had to lay my head down because I couldn't keep my eyes open or my head up. A co worker walked in on me like that and laughed. I told her it reminded me of that old poster of Garfield I use to have hanging in my locker when I was in high school. It showed him standing there with a bunch of books strapped all over him with belts and he says "I'm learning by osmosis"

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A bit of bad news. One of my cousins was killed in a car wreck today. I'm not sure how old she was, maybe 20, if that much. This was not her first wreck, either. I stood next to her mother, my aunt, last night at the business committee meeting. I just can't believe it. I can't believe it.

I'm in the mood for love

Ah, February. The month of love. And black history month. But, since I'm not black, it's the month of love for me. Time for all those romantic movies on TV. All those hot, sexy kisses in the movies. Encore Love channel is playing "kiss" movies (no not Gene Simmons, thank GOD) and it got me in the mood for The Notebook. So, I got out my DVD, wiped the dust off the cover and started it on one of my favorite scenes. Well, then I thought I would make a list (you know my passion for lists) of my most favorite romantic movies and romantic books. I've seen LOTS of romantic movies and probably have read twice as many romantic books. So, here's a few of my favorites.

Movies:

The Notebook (it's a given)

While You Were Sleeping

A Walk To Remember

Sleepless in Seattle

An Affair to remember

Singing In The Rain

Ever After

Okay, I could go on and on, but I'll stop at seven. Now on to books. I've read so many "romance novels" I couldn't even begin to count. I remember the first romance book I read, it was borrowed from Diva, back when we were juniors in high school, and our English teacher made us all read books that were different from what we normally read. Like for Mike, any book would have been different than what he normally read. lol. Boys were to read romance novels, girls westerns. Since I liked westerns and had already done a book review on one, she told me I had to read a romance. Had I only known the broad scope of the genre, I could have read such a better book. But, back then I thought romance were either those skinny little Harlequin books or the big fat ones with Fabeo on the front where they talk about her milky white thighs and his quivering loins. I don't remember the book title, and I vaguely remember what it was even about, but the parts I do remember went something like this: Indian brave kidnaps white woman. Indian brave has the hots for white woman. White woman loathes Indian brave yet secretly lusts after him. Enter creamy white thighs and quivering loins, and you've got yourself a book.

But, you know what? I've come a long way since those days. I've never read another one of those "Fabio" books, but I've read several Harlequin books, each one as forgettable as the next. But along the way, I've read some really good romance books. Here's my list:

The Notebook (imagine that!) by Nicholas Sparks

The Wedding (even better than The Notebook, if it could be done) by Nicholas Sparks

Years by LaVyrle Spencer

November Of The Heart by LaVyrle Spencer

Then Came Heaven by LaVyrle Spencer

I know, I know, it seems I'm a little limited to my authors, but that really isn't the case. I read a lot of different authors, but these books were worth remembering and I've even read them all over and over. Especially Years. The reason I love these books is because they are true romance. No smut, romance. So pure (especially in Years) and innocent that it makes me literally feel the same way the characters are feeling. I have felt that euphoric love and reading these books, I can remember that feeling. Remember the rush of feeling with that first kiss. Like electricity. That first touch.

So, how old were you when you got your first kiss? I was 11, mere weeks away from turning 12, and my first kiss was with Brian Highfill. He taught me the fine art of the french kiss. Every time I hear any song from the Van Halen album 1984, it immediately transports me back to that summer, sitting on a bench at Sycamore Valley, the sun starting to go down and me telling him I had to go when the sun went behind that hill. And then he kissed me. (Yes, I sang that last line) When I stop and think that my own daughter is 11 it makes me SHUDDER.

Please, don't take this the wrong way

But, Shael's math teacher is a bitch! She finally got back to me, by email, no less, and didn't call me like I requested her to. Seems she's been out sick. Oops, sorry. Bitch. She told me some things that I had no idea about. See, Shael doesn't tell me anything! That makes me mad at both of them. She told me that she made a deal with Shael that IF she made an effort and turned in all her papers the next semester, she would put her grade up to a D (instead of a 48%), and she said she didn't even turn in the very first paper so the deal was off. So, guess who gets a 48% on their semester grade card? Oh, I am ticked! I understand that she feels she has given Shael chance after chance after chance, because she has. But she is leaving Shael's parents, me and Mike, totally in the dark about what is going on in school. When we ask Shael how she's doing in math, if she's turning in her papers and Shael says things are not good, but could be worse, and yes she's turning in her papers, what are we suppose to do? Say "NO YOU'RE NOT, LIAR!" We believe her. Well, we did anyway. She said she's given Shael two print outs showing what papers have not been turned in. Hello!? Does that teacher really think Shael is bringing these things home? *NOTE TO 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHERS EVERYWHERE +++ DO NOT SEND NOTES HOME WITH CHILDREN, THE PARENTS WILL NOT RECEIVE THEM!* This teacher also tells me that parent/teacher conferences are Wednesday and Friday. WTF? This is the first I've heard of this and it's Tuesday. My daughter. She only thought she was in deep shit. She's just digging her hole deeper so more shit can pile up on her.

It's All Right

Cuz I'm saved by the bell! Okay, I'll fess up, I still watch Saved By The Bell. That Zach Morris, he still does it for me...woo-hoo! lol

Grrrr

I couldn't get a picture to post on this blog before this stupid *&#$^% computer would freeze up. I finally tried to post one on my other blog Life As I See It and guess what? It worked without a glitch. Go figure. Stupid thing.
So, if you want to see my hair pictures, go to my old site.

All About Me

Sometimes I get the urge to write boring facts about myself. Some may call these urges memes. People use to send me the same questioners over and over till I felt like I could answer the questions for some of these people. I'd read the same answers so many times! You know the ones...What's you're full name? Chocolate or Vanilla? Has someone you love ever made you cry? Come ON! Let's get some originality here. So, one time I made up my own and sent it to just a couple friends, being totally sarcastic. I think it had questions on it like What's your favorite sexual position? and How many times a day do you fart? Somehow it got passed around on the Internet and guess what? A couple weeks later someone sent it to me. I'd been published. Ha! I looked at all the forwards (because you know, not everybody cleans up a forward before clicking send) and was kind of embarrassed by all the people it had been sent to. Oh, well, no one ever said anything to me about it. My poor meme. It never writes, it never calls.

But, tonight, while I'm waiting on the last couple batches of cookies to bake in my little toaster oven (it takes quite a while longer than using my oven, but it doesn't heat the house up so much and uses no propane) I'm going to write to you a few unimportant things about myself that only my husband knows. Ooooo, I can feel the excitement. I know you are all trembling with the desire to know my secrets.

#1. I eat the cookie dough, but never the baked cookie. Well, okay, not never but hardly ever.

#2. I like the smell of puppy breath, even though it smells vaguely like a skunk.

#3. Barry White's voice is the fingernails on my chalkboard. *shiver* I call it "hairy"

#4. I get the walking farts after eating beans.

#5. I have hair around my belly button.

#6. I'll sit on the pot reading so long that I'll pee twice.

#7. I have an aversion to curtains or any kind of window treatment.

#8. High places make my feet tingle.

#9. I don't like to cuddle.

#10. I don't like anyone's breath to touch anywhere on my body.

See, I told y'all I's weird.

Super Bowl Blues

Are all you women playing around on the computer while your husbands are watching the big game? Like I am. My husband really doesn't care a whole lot, I think he likes the commercials more than he does the game.

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I went to a local "haunt" today and saw a ballet production of Midsummer Night's Dream. Anything at the Coleman I have to try to empty my thoughts of any and all supernatural thoughts before I walk in so I can enjoy what I'm watching. Not that I am a big supernatural thinker, but each year around Halloween they give Haunted Tours at the Coleman Theater and my Diva friend has gone every year. I'm too chicken to go. The place is suppose to be haunted. I had a thought wiggle it's way into my brain midway through the ballet and I had to push it back because if I felt something touch my hair I was going to stand up and make a fool out of myself getting out of there and into the sunlight. I gave a quick look-see above me in the balcony and I didn't see any ladies dressed in early 1900's attire peering back at me, so I gave myself a mental shake and watched the rest of the ballet. It was sooo good, too! Hardly cheesy at all, like most things Miami. I couldn't hear the dancers feet squawking like the last ballet I went to there. It was just really good. Midsummer Night's Dream is a comedy, right, and at one point "Puck" did some subtle move that made me laugh out loud. I was the only one who laughed. I knew I wasn't stupid, it was suppose to be funny, I guess just no one else caught it. What made me feel better was when I saw the guy playing Puck smile real big when he heard me laugh. Before the ballet, a narrator told the whole story so people would be able to follow. I already knew the story, having seen the movie. I've never read it, I'm not that cultured.
The pre show was good, too. A woman sang one opera song and two show tunes. Man, she was excellent! Then this gal came out and played the violin while a man narrated "Ashokan Farewell" from the PBS series "The Civil War". Oh. My. Goodness. I got goosebumps. She played that violin in that scratchy sound you hear with all documentaries on the Civil War that is reminiscent of Irish ballads. It was wonderful. Wish I could hear that again.

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I'd better get my supper eaten so Shael and I can go on to church. This sounds bad, but if Shael didn't have to go tonight to turn in her fund raiser, I would stay home. It's cold outside and warm in here. Plus I can't wear my bath robe to church with no bra or shoes on.

Hello world

The reason I had to post from Hello was because my dashboard was blank. No blog on it at all. When I tried to sign in it said that no blog was found by that name. Hmmm...Don't know why, either. The only thought I had was maybe from my 40 days of inactivity because before it was fine and after it was gone. One night in the last few moments before sleep I had this thought about Hello. Could I still post a picture? I wondered. So, the next morning, the first thing I did was log on and check out Hello. Sure enough, I could still post a picture, but not only that, but I found out that I could post text only, also. Just no paragraphs because if I hit enter it would post my message. Also, no editing once I posted, no spell check or anything like that. It was a pain, but at least it worked temporarily, ya know?

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I did something exciting for myself today. I got rid of a bushel of unwanted hair. Hair, hair, glorious hair. Hair off my eyebrows (I ripped out enough hair from there to make two whole new eyebrows for some poor old woman who's eyebrows are nonexistent), hair off my lip (enough to make a prepubescent boy jealous) and a real, live haircut. Well, maybe it's not live but, you catch my drift, right? I even took pictures of before and after. Shael took them, actually. I'll get them on here as soon as I get them off my camera and on my computer.

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I went to Wal-Mart today and I had socks for me and for Mike on my list. Going through the sock aisle I noticed these beef cakes on the Hanes t-shirt bags. Actually, I noticed them last week when I was cutting through there to get to something else. But, today when I went there on purpose, I took a little more time gandering at them. Talk about a sales gimmick! Appeals to the women "Hmm..Maybe if I buy these Hanes t-shirts for my husband he'll look like that and not like Homer Simpson". Appeals to the men "Hmmm...Maybe if I buy these Hanes t-shirts I can show off my biceps and look like these guys and my old lady will like that!"

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Shael is watching Annie on ABC family and that show still cracks me up. It's the one with Carol Burnett as Miss Hannigan. Some women are dripping with diamonds, some women are dripping with pearl. Look at me look at me look at what I'm dripping with...Little Girls! Classic movie. I remember the first time I saw it. It was at the theater and I was on the very back wall sitting in a wheel chair with my right leg sticking straight out in a cast up to my hip. My Mom took me to see a movie because she felt sorry for me for missing the 4th of July carnival. I'd missed it because I got hit by a car on the way to the carnival after the fireworks. Hence the broken leg. I was 9 years old. When Shael was 9 years old, I'd think about me in that cast and I would cringe thinking I would probably not be able to hold myself together as well as my Mother did if it were Shael getting hit by a car and breaking her leg. *shudder* Sometimes I wonder what my family felt and thought when that happened, but being the tight lipped family when it comes to touchy/feely things I would never ask or expect them to tell me. Yes, we are strange like that, but it's our way and I'd like to keep it that way, thankyouverymuch.

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On the way to Grove today I followed a truck that had a sticker on it's back window that I couldn't quite read until I got close to it at a stop sign. It said "Praise the Lorwered". And anybody who knows the South knows that's the correct pronunciation. To be even more correct, it should have read "Praaaaaaaiiiise the Lorwered". That's how they'd say it in "Bayou LeBatre, Alabama" from Forrest Gump. Even though I'm technically not a Southerner, I'm an Okie and that's closer to being a Southerner than a Yank is. What are people in Virginia called? They aren't really Yanks, but they certainly aren't Southerners, either. They're an enigma. They are deceiving. They sound like a Southerner, but they act like a Yank. Okay, are y'all tired of my stereotyping, yet?

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I don't really have anything else to post about, but I'm so excited about being able to make real paragraphs that I had to make just one more before I quit.

Dance, I say!

Yesterday was horrible. Mike dropped Shael off at my work, again. Foiling my plans to go to the grocery store alone. I was still miffed at her about her grades so I wasn't too happy to see her. Poor kid. I tried my best to keep my cool. Mike came in and said he had to pee and I was nagging on him all the way into the bathroom. He looked over at me and said "Well, shut the door if you're going to come in here!" So, I shut it and just paced back and forth in that big one hole bathroom. He stood there for the longest time trying to go and I finally told him I wasn't looking. Ha! I thought he had stage fright but it turns out that he was so cold that he had to "find it" first before it would come out. He'd driven down there on his bike and it wasn't as warm as he at first thought. But, enough on Mike's peeing habits, he told me he'd just take Shael back with him and I told him to forget it (why do I do that?) that I'd just take her home and get groceries some other day. On the drive home, I turned the radio off and we had a nice heart to heart talk. Mostly it was me asking her questions and her mumbling "I dunno". When we got home, I didn't even walk inside, I went around the side of the house to the back yard, and got me a switch. Shael was watching me from the back door, I could see her out of the corner of my eye, just watching and looking generally scared out of her wits. When I got it all cleaned up and ready for action, I went in. She had taken off to her room. I had to call her back into the living room. She was crying already because she knew what was in store for her. First before I did anything I would regret, I got out her report card and had her look at it and tell me if I was looking at it wrong. Did I make a mistake? I mean, it's hard to look at it wrong when it says Teacher: Pugh Class: math Grade: x . She shook her head and said her grade was what I thought it was so I told her to turn around and don't put her hands in the way. She still had her coat on and had her hands in her pocket for that first swat. "Ooooowwwww! That hurts!" Why do kids always say that? Of course, it hurts, that's kind of the point, right? That's what I told her anyway. She kept putting her hand down in the way and I eventually whacked her across her right hand in the process. When I was done I told her to start bringing home her math book every night and any time she forgot then she could look forward to another switching. And if she didn't bring her grades up by the next grade card time, she could expect it again. Then I sent her to her room and told her not to come out until I told her she could. I sent her to her room so she wouldn't see me collapse on the love seat and bawl my eyes out. Later when she got to come out, she was all lovey dovey to me, hugging and kissing me, like nothing happened. After she went to bed last night, Mike found the switch over by the wood stove and he laughed saying she was probably going to try to nonchalantly throw it in the fire without us noticing. That's okay, she can if she wants. We have 5.5 acres more where that one came from.

I finally broke down and made a new one

Here I am. Again. If this one messed up, then forget it, I think I'll either post from hello the rest of my days or give up altogether. Hopefully this one will make it longer than my other one did.